Bleats

Who Thought Cardboard Beds Were A Good Idea For Horny Olympians?

They're promising the beds won't break.

Welp, the Olympics have made the second statement within a week that I predict will absolutely backfire. First they announced that they were banning protests from the games, so I 100% assume someone will protest. Now they’re making sure everyone knows that the cardboard beds won’t collapse when athletes bang, so I assume several beds are about to collapse. 

The Tokyo Olympics kick off in July this year, and the cardboard beds in the Olympic Village have actually been a pretty massive deal. The cardboard is meant to be really sturdy, and after the games are over they’ll be broken down and recycled into paper products. Even the mattresses – not made of cardboard thankfully – will be recycled into plastic products. 

According to Takashi Kitajima, the general manager of the Athletes Village, the beds can take up to 200kgs, which doesn’t seem like a lot tbh. Some of those weightlifters and shot putters have back muscles that weigh more than my entire body, but I digress. 

He also admitted that “wood and cardboard would each break if you jumped on them,” talking about athletes jumping on the bed, but frankly I think we can all read between the lines on that one.

Giggity

They’ve changed their tunes now though, after the manufacturer of the beds said that the beds will be fine as long as athletes stick to only two Olympians in a cardboard bed.

During the 2018 Winter Olympics in Pyeongchang, Tinder usage shot up. And not just by a small amount. Total Tinder usage went up 348%, right swipes by 565%, and there were 644% more matches in total.

Athletes train incredibly hard and the Olympics are emotional, people are going to bang, a lot. For now I’ll see you in July when we get our first reports of collapsing cardboard beds, because I’m positive it’ll happen.

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Some Good Has Come From TI Commenting On His Daughter’s Hymen

Making lemonade out of terrible, terrible lemons.

Remember when TI decided that it would be a really great idea to announce to the world that he takes his daughter to the doctor so that she can have her hymen checked? It feels like a million years have passed since then, but it was actually all of a month ago.

After being dragged to hell and back, and finally admitting that he regrets making the comments, New York State have moved to ban hymen checks.

If only he’d done this sooner

State lawmakers over in New York have introduced legislation that would make it illegal for any doctors in the state to perform the sorts of ‘virginity checks’ that TI described. A note about the bill written by lawmakers said that it was designed “to prevent the performance of hymen examinations on women as a means to ascertain whether a woman is a virgin.” 

“These examinations are not only a violation of women’s and girls’ human rights, but in cases of rape can cause additional pain and mimic the original act of sexual violence, leading to re-experience, re-traumatization and re-victimization,” the note said.

“Many women suffer from adverse short- and long-term physical, psychological and social consequences of this practice. This includes anxiety, depression and post-traumatic stress. In extreme cases, women or girls may attempt suicide or be killed in the name of ‘honour.'”

Virginity is a social construct, but it’s also something that is used to control women on an unprecedented scale. If a celebrity like TI is seen laughing off the seriousness of taking his daughter to get hymen checks, then what sort of message does that send to people who might be considering doing the same? Not a good one, that’s for sure.

New York State realising the seriousness of his comments is a breath of fresh air in what’s been a ridiculous saga. The whole situation is bad, but at least something good has come of it all.

How Safe Is Your Number - And Nudes - With Facebook Dating?

Where will all the unsolicited dick pics go?

There are no shortage of red flags when it comes to online dating. There are catfish, unicorn hunters, unsolicited dick pics, and endless “haha and then what ;)” messages. That’s all without worrying about whether or not the actual info you give the site is going to be released all over the internet.

Facebook has announced it will be rolling out a new feature in the US called Facebook Dating. It’s a dating site that can be accessed from the main app if you fill out a separate dating profile, then connects you with people based on where you are, preferences you’ve told Facebook about, events you’ve attended, and groups you’re in, amongst other things. You’ll even be able to link your Instagram up to it.

Facebook knows so much about us that I suppose it does make sense that they’d be able to find the best matches for us, but the flip side of the coin is that Facebook doesn’t have a great track record of keeping what they know about us private. The announcement of the Dating rollout came the day after Facebook admitted to accidentally releasing the Facebook IDs and phone numbers of 419 million people. Think about the size of that number for a second. The entire population of Australia is 25 million, and Facebook accidentally released 419 million people’s information. The mind boggles.

Of course that’s just the most recent breach. There was that time a bug in the system made 14 million people’s private posts public; the time that a hacker got in and compromised 50 million accounts; and then there was the whole Cambridge Analytica mess. And those were all in 2018 alone. 

Facebook Dating is going to have a feature called “Secret Crush” (side note: that name makes my skin crawl) that allows you to allocate up to nine people as a secret crush. Those people won’t know they’re your crush unless they also nominate you as a secret crush of theirs. If we can’t trust Facebook with our phone numbers, why should we trust them to keep our crushes secret?

Maybe it’s not fair to pin all these concerns on Facebook. Other dating websites have certainly had their fair share of security breaches, and by definition dating sites have some pretty personal info. Lest we forget the Ashley Madison leaks.

When Judith Duportail, a reporter for The Guardian, requested that Tinder send her all of her data, she got far more than she expected:

“Some 800 pages came back containing information such as my Facebook ‘likes’, links to where my Instagram photos would have been had I not previously deleted the associated account, my education, the age-rank of men I was interested in, how many Facebook friends I had, when and where every online conversation with every single one of my matches happened … the list goes on.”

It’s a scary amount of info, and they probably have a similar amount of data on you and I. And the best part is that Tinder’s very own privacy policy says:

“Although we take steps to secure your information, we do not promise, and you should not expect, that your personal information, chats, or other communications will always remain secure.”

At least they’re honest. 

Unfortunately garbage security is just a part of being on the internet these days, so for now add “it will stay in my data forever” to the list of reasons not to send an unsolicited dick pic.

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