Life is slowly getting back to normal now that COVID-19 restrictions are easing up and it’s brought up an interesting question: how will we approach sex after the pandemic having readjusted our needs (and budget) due to the coronavirus? Well best get your imagination running wild because apparently the post COVID-19 sex landscape will involve less kissing and casual hookups, and more face masks and *checks notes* glory holes.
Speaking of sex, the GOAT team talk to Handi, designers of the world’s first line of sex toys for people with disabilities, on ‘It’s Been A Big Day For…’ below:
Having originally released a COVID-19 sex advice thingy that basically boiled down to “only have sex with people you’re living with and/or yourself, and stay clean at all times” the New York City Health Department has updated it in light of improving conditions (relatively speaking) and it’s gone straight into next level thirst territory.
Face masks or coverings are now recommended during sex. While “maybe it’s your thing, maybe it’s not,” face masks are more to do with preventing the spread of COVID-19 than any sex stuff, though it can be used for that too.
But the pièce de résistance of this post COVID-19 sex advisory is this horny little tidbit: “Be creative with sexual positions and physical barriers, like walls, that allow sexual contact while preventing close face to face contact.”
In other words, get your post COVID-19 glory hole on and use your imagination.
For those who aren’t too keen on wearing a face mask during sex, having little to no kissing or close face to face contact, or sticking their junk into glory holes, the NYC COVID-19 sex advisory also recommends “video dates, sexting, subscription-based fan platforms, sexy ‘Zoom parties’ or chat rooms may be options for you.”
Kinky virtual orgies and sex parties over Zoom may not be everyone’s cup of tea but at least there’s no risk of spreading COVID-19 that way. Casual sex is also not off the table but you have to be vigilant and practice the usual COVID-19 rules. That also includes face masks and no kissing.
Of course, it goes without saying that all this post COVID-19 sex stuff goes on top of the usual safe sex practices. Just because the pandemic is closer to the end than the beginning doesn’t mean things like consent or condoms are to be ignored. And if you’re feeling sick or unwell, you’ll have to avoid sex altogether.
You may laugh at some of these post COVID-19 sex rules but they’re very much a reality. Sex workers in Australia are operating under a similar framework that includes no orgies, limited to no kissing and face-to-face contact. They haven’t said anything about glory holes though but that’s presumably on the table, just as long as all surfaces are properly cleaned first.
It’s going to take a long time before things get back to some semblance of normality after COVID-19, so we’ll just have to accept the fact that sex in a post-pandemic landscape will involve face masks instead of kissing and sticking your junk into holes in walls rather than going around looking for casual hookups.
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