Remember when dating was just…dating? Sadly, those days of chocolate and roses are long gone. From catfishing to breadcrumbing and ghosting, there are more dating ‘trends’ than there are dating apps these days, making finding love an absolute minefield.
In 2020, we have a new dating trend to be afraid of. Introducing….‘stashing.’
According to Refinery29, ‘stashing’ is “when you date someone who’s happy to spend time with you one-on-one – but they never introduce you to their friends and family.”
Apparently, the term was first coined by Metro UK writer Ellen Scott in 2017, who defined it as “a super fun dating trend in which someone is dating someone else, but had decided to hide them away from everyone in their life.”
“A victim of stashing is hidden from every other part of the stasher’s life – from their tagged photos to their casual chats with their parents. Why? Because that way, they’re able to pretend that they’re not really dating the person they’re stashing, meaning they can justify getting with other people, doing whatever they fancy, and being generally inconsiderate and awful,” Scott wrote.
Honestly, stashing sounds bloody awful – and it could be one of the worst dating trends out there. Sadly, it’s not the only one we’re going to facing in 2020. ‘Fleabagging’ is another trend to watch out for on your dating journey.
Inspired by Phoebe Waller-Bridge’s character in her show Fleabag, ‘fleabagging’ is “the toxic cycle of break up and make up, with that substandard person who does nothing but stress you out,” according to Cosmo’s dating expert Hayley Quinn.
“You could call fleabagging making really bad relationship choices again, and again, and again,” Quinn said. Yikes!
In her TEDx Talk, Quinn says, “we continue to chase love because I think love is sold to us, as almost like the ultimate solution to ourselves: the things that makes our past okay, that gives us direction for the future, and imbues our everyday reality with meaning”.
“Go for people who make time and effort for you and reciprocate this positive behaviour!” she says. “Eventually you’ll find yourself naturally choosing people who choose to prioritise you and in turn, allowing someone to love you as you are.”