Bleats

Hallmark Pulled A Same-Sex Wedding Ad Because Of The Karens

"We don’t want to generate controversy."

UPDATE: Hallmark have since apologised, saying that “Hallmark is, and always has been, committed to diversity and inclusion.”

Today I learned about something called the Streisand effect. In 2003, Barbra Streisand sued the California Coastal Records Project over a photo of the California coast that included her mansion, saying that it invaded her privacy. Nobody cared about these pictures at all and hardly anybody would have seen them until she tried to stop them being seen, and then everyone cared. 

It’s exactly what has happened to the Hallmark Channel after they pulled an ad featuring a wedding between two brides in an attempt to avoid controversy.

Love is love, Hallmark

The ads were for a wedding planning website called Zola, who had six ads running on Hallmark. Four of those ads included LGBTIQ+ relationships, but the one that ended up pulled featured a lesbian couple. 

The ad aired, and a far-right Christian group called One Million Moms was immediately pissed. They launched a petition that got 27,000 signatures (in a country of 327 million but ok) wanting the ad taken down for corrupting morals or something. Instead of ignoring them like any decent company would do, Hallmark actually pulled the ad.

Yeesh…

In a statement, Hallmark said that “The debate surrounding these commercials on all sides was distracting from the purpose of our network, which is to provide entertainment value.” 

“The Hallmark brand is never going to be divisive. We don’t want to generate controversy, we’ve tried very hard to stay out of it … we just felt it was in the best interest of the brand to pull them and not continue to generate controversy.”

For what it’s worth, Zola have pulled all of their other ads from Hallmark and said that “All kisses, couples and marriages are equal celebrations of love.”

Credit: @Zola

So great job, Hallmark. By trying to avoid controversy over an ad that a lot of people would never have seen, you’ve sent the ad all over the world and have created an incredible amount of controversy. For a “family friendly” channel, you sure seem to have forgotten about a lot of families out there.

As for the One Million Moms? Go back to demanding to see the manager and let people live their lives, damn.

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All The Lessons We Learned From This Bin Fire Decade

1. Never believe political polls.

One thing that people love to do when something goes horribly wrong is to learn from the disaster so that we can all move forwards feeling like we’ll avoid the same mistakes. I would argue that the 2010s themselves were a bit of a wreck, so what lessons did we get from this decade?

Don’t Believe Polling
Remember how we all laughed and laughed at the thought of Donald Trump becoming president? How it felt like all the experts were telling us it would never happen? And then it did. We felt the same about the Brexit referendum voting to leave and Scott Morrison winning another term in parliament. It just couldn’t happen right? All the polls said otherwise?

Yeah, I don’t know about you, but I’m never ever believing another poll ever again. 

Our Attention Spans Are Shot
God, I miss Vine. It catered to the fact that we all wanted maximum entertainment with minimum commitment, and people managed to do amazing things with those six seconds. Ever since the demise of Vine (R.I.P.) I’ve noticed that I just can’t be bothered with long videos or posts.

Imagine trying to get a video like Kony 2012 – which was half an hour long – as popular today. No way in hell am I watching a half hour YouTube clip, thank you.

Jelly Shoes Are Not Cute
Worst trend ever.

Everyone Can Have A Go At Being PM
You get a Prime Ministership, you get a Prime Ministership, you all get a Prime Ministership! 

Since 2010, we’ve had six Prime Ministers and four elections. It’s exhausting to deal with, and honestly if a Class A Turnip (onion?) like Tony Abbot gets a go in the spot, then I want a turn. 

Nazis Didn’t Disappear After WWII
This is probably the most depressing lesson. When we entered the 2010s, the phrase “Nazis are 100% bad 100% of the time” was an obvious statement. Now they’re “very fine people” and a German city has straight up declared a Nazi Emergency.

Credit: Imgur

We’re going to need a lot of eggs.

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Forget Twitter, Can Someone Please Take Away Trump's Photoshop

Preferably before he photoshops himself onto Rocky Balb- never mind.

Donald Trump is a walking, talking meme. From ‘covfefe’, to ‘bigly’, to whatever other dumb thing he said this morning, there’s always something happening for the internet to take the piss out of. While pretty much everyone agrees that he shouldn’t be in charge of a Twitter account – let alone a country – I have a new suggestion for the list of things that should be taken off of Trump. Photoshop.

You might have seen the news that Greta Thunberg has been announced as Time Magazine’s person of the year, which is great! Trump of course, found a way to make it all about him by telling her to deal with anger and “chill” by watching a movie with a friend for some reason. In classic Greta style, she updated her Twitter bio to read “A teenager working on her anger management problem. Currently chilling and watching a good old fashioned movie with a friend.”

Instead of leaving it there, Trump’s official reelection campaign Twitter tweeted… this.

I’m going to brush over how insecure you’d have to be to do this in the first place, and the fact that Trump was person of the year in 2016. Why photoshop his head on to Greta? For what reason?

It’s only been a matter of days since we say Trump’s head photoshopped on to Thanos, in an amazing display of missing the point. 

Then there was the Rocky Balboa tweet.

Aaaaaand the hero dog tweet.

And those are only the ones that have happened over the last few weeks.
I really hope this isn’t a new trend for Trump and his team, because I’m not sure how much more of it I can take. I’m calling it now, though – we’ll see a picture of Trump’s head photoshopped onto Obama within the next six months, and the internet will lose its shit.

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