Bleats

Best Grab Snacks, This Jameela Jamil 'Investigation' Is A Wild Ride

BEES!

In the space of a week, Jameela Jamil has hurriedly came out as queer, then told the world that she regretted it, and now she’s defending herself against accusations of Munchausen Sydndrome. It’s been a really bad week for her.

Want more wild conspiracies? Check out the GOAT Team wrapping up last year’s most wild ones.

For context, Munchausen Syndrome is “mental disorder in which the patient fakes illness to gain attention and sympathy,” and is a pretty serious condition. 

A producer and writer named Tracie Morrissey has gone on a deep dive the likes of which I haven’t seen in a very long time, and come out the other end saying that Jameela Jamil is faking (or at least massively exaggerating) injuries and illness.

Down we go

Putting all of her evidence into an Insta story that’s now saved to her highlights reel, Tracie says she first started to feel a bit suss about all this when she saw a video of Jameela falling over after a day of filming. Jameela said she’d lost a tooth, broken her nose and elbow, and got a concussion from the fall. According to Tracie, Jameela’s nose and elbow looked fine after the fall, and the fall wasn’t bad enough to cause those injuries anyway.

She then starts going down a real rabbit hole. She says that Jameela’s many, many encounters with bees are either some super shit luck or just didn’t happen. Jameela says she’s been hit by a car twice – once at 17 and once when she was filming season one of The Good Place – while running away from a swarm of bees, and got swarmed another time when she and Mark Ronson were chased by a “cloud” of bees.

The best part of that is that when Mark Ronson was asked about the bee incident in an interview, and said “I think that maybe we were sitting outside and there was a fruit plate nearby and maybe one or two individual bees approached slowly and instead of running from a swarm of killer bees, I think we said like, ‘Should we go inside?’ We walked slowly inside.”

Jameela has jumped on Twitter to reply, and addressed all of the examples that Tracie brought up. 

While some defences sound good, others are a bit more questionable. For example, when speaking about surviving cancer twice, this was her response:

It admittedly feels a bit off to call a cancer scare “surviving cancer.”

Eventually though, Jameela signed off by saying that  “I’ve said my bit. I’ve explained and defended every single accusation In my various threads. Now if you’ll excuse me I have to get on with a speech I’m writing for the UN. So have fun arguing about how many times YOU think I’ve run away from bees. Or if YOU think I had cancer!”

The truth, as always, is probably somewhere in the middle. At the end of the day, I absolutely cannot fault the dedication to the deep dive from Tracie’s investigation into Jameela Jamil’s possible Munchausen Syndrome. I’m invested as hell.

Always be in the loop with our snackable podcast breaking the biggest story of the day. Subscribe to It’s Been A Big Day For… on your favourite podcast app.

Today I Learned That Nike's Slogan Was Inspired By A Killer's Last Words

Mad Men wasn't that far off after all.

Inspiration comes from everywhere, including the most unlikely of places. Maybe when you’re out walking, or maybe your niece says something funny. Or maybe a man gets executed for killing two people and you take his last words as inspiration for the Nike slogan, which goes on to be one of the most recognisable slogans ever. Maybe.

This slogan.

In Utah, July 1976, Gary Gilmore drove off after having a fight with his girlfriend and decided to stop at a service station. Once he got there he walked up to the attendant, Max Jensen, and pulled out a gun. He told Jensen to empty out his pockets and then go to the bathroom and lie on the floor. From there, Gilmore shot Jensen twice in the head.

The next day he drove to a motel. He walked in and told the hotel manager, Bennie Bushnell, to give him the cash box and get down on the ground. Just like before, Gilmore shot Bushnell in the head while he was lying on the floor.

While he was fleeing the scene, Gary Gilmore tried to throw the gun used in the murders into a bush, and failed spectacularly by shooting himself in the hand. After that particularly genius move, he went to his cousin’s place for help and painkillers. She obviously freaked out and called the police.

Gary Gilmore was sentenced to death, and chose to face the firing squad. Standing in front of the guns, he was asked if he had any last words.

“Let’s do it.”

This line was picked up by Dan Wieden, then the head of ad agency Wieden & Kennedy, who used it in a 1988 Nike commercial.

In an interview years later, Wieden said “I like the ‘do it’ part of it.”

If you’re picturing a scene from Mad Men, you’re probably not that far off. “None of us really paid that much attention. We thought ‘Yeah. That would work.’”

And work it did, because we’re still repeating Nike’s Just Do It slogan over and over again today.

Want something better to take inspo from? How about Gwyneth Paltrow’s wild energy?

Always be in the loop with our snackable podcast breaking the biggest story of the day. Subscribe to It’s Been A Big Day For… on your favourite podcast app.

Tyra Banks' 'Modelland' Is Starting To Sound Like Fyre Fest 2.0

We were rooting for her.

Tyra Banks announced ‘Modelland’ early last year, and we were promised a “multi-level 21,000 sq. ft space, which will include retail and dining options, will be open to the public, who can buy tickets” in Santa Monica, California. The point of Modelland was to bring “modelling to the masses, while expanding the definition of beauty,” which has apparently been Tyra’s life long goal. 

It was all well and good when it was a vague idea, but a year later it’s beginning to sound more and more like a certain famous festival that went down in a ball of flames. A ball of Fyre, one might even say.

In a new interview with The View, Tyra Banks has told us all that the inspiration for Modelland was being told ‘no’ all the time, that it’s kind of like Wakanda, and that some kids opened up a portal to Los Angeles. It’s a wild ride, and I don’t think I’m tall enough to ride it tbh.

So it’s full of models, it’s on a really famous beach, and there are disturbingly few concrete details. See where I’m headed with this?

Fyre Festival was so bad that it became the comparison point for all major disasters, and I have a sneaking suspicion that Modelland is going to go close. Tyra is promising that it will be open “later this winter,” but winter in the US is over when February ends, so I don’t know what to tell you.

Want more bad ideas? Listen to the GOAT Team facepalm over Hallmark removing an LGBT ad…

Maybe this will be a major success and Modelland will be this amazing attraction that had all the amazing details kept under wraps. But we thought that of Fyre Fest too, and look what happened. I don’t think Tyra Banks is going to end up in jail for fraud over Modelland, but I reckon there’s a very good chance that visitors will get served crappy cheese sandwiches.

Always be in the loop with our snackable podcast breaking the biggest story of the day. Subscribe to It’s Been A Big Day For… on your favourite podcast app.

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