Bleats

Macaulay Culkin Wants You To Stop Making Gross Jokes About His Friendship With Michael Jackson

Fair.

About 28 years ago, when Macaulay Culkin was a 10-year-old star off the back of his Home Alone fame, he famously struck up a friendship with music legend Michael Jackson. At the time there was a 22-year age gap between the pair and so their relationship was a major topic of interest and speculation for fans and pretty much, the whole world.

The scrutiny was only intensified after Jackson, who died at 50 in 2009 from an overdose of propofol, stood trial in 2005 on charges tied to allegations he molested a 13-year-old boy he had befriended. The music legend was found not guilty, but the rumours lingered and eventually became a big part of Michael Jackson’s legacy.

But Macaulay Culkin does not want that story to be a part of his own legacy, which is especially understandable considering how regularly the controversy is referenced in jest, usurped inappropriately for comedy and entertainment.

On an episode of the “Inside of You With Michael Rosenbaum” podcast released Tuesday, Culkin insisted their friendship was innocent, “so normal and mundane”.

Macaulay Culkin  appeared in Jackson’s ‘Black or White’ music video and was made godfather to all three of the popstar’s children.

He admitted their friendship may have seemed weird on the outside due to the significant age difference and Jackson being “the most famous person in the world”, but it felt totally normal to them.

“He reached out to me because a lot of things were happening, big and fast with me and I think he identified with that,’” he said. “At the end of the day, it’s almost easy to say it was weird or whatever, but it wasn’t because it made sense. At the end of the day, we were friends.”

Culkin then explained that he had more in common with Jackson, who would have been in his thirties, than children at his school as they had both found fame really young, with the music icon joining family group The Jackson 5 when he was only five years old.

“I was a peerless person. Nobody else in my Catholic school had even this much idea of what I was going through and he was the kind of person who’d been through the exact same frickin’ thing and wanted to make sure I wasn’t alone,” he said. “For me, it’s so normal and mundane… I know it’s a big deal to everyone else, but to me, it was a normal friendship.”

The iconic child star also recalled how he would prank call people with the ‘Beat It’ singer, who he described as “hilarious,” “sweet,” and “funny”.

Let’s consider this a request from Macaulay Culkin that people stop publicly dissecting his childhood with assumptions and aspersions, and absolutely cut the gross jokes. He shouldn’t have to ask for that, because it should really never be a joke.

The Home Alone Fans Have Voted So Macaulay Culkin Is Legally Changing His Middle Name To Sound Absolutely Cooked

That really rolls off the tongue.

For Christmas this year, our beloved Home Alone star Macaulay Culkin has not only gifted us with the reassurance that his life is well and truly back on track, but also a promise to legally change his name according to what the popular vote has decided.

He announced in November that he set up a poll on his lifestyle website BunnyEars and invited fans to weigh in on what his new middle name should be.

Out of the options ‘Shark Week’, ‘Kieran’, ‘TheMcRibIsBack’, ‘Publicity Stunt’, and, ‘Macaulay Culkin’, of course, ‘Macaulay Culkin’ has been triumphant.

He announced the good news on Twitter, promising that, In 2019 my new legal name will be: Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin. It has a nice ring to it (if you like my name). #MerryChristmas.”

The crowd overwhelmingly sided with the opportunity to see Macaulay Culkin become Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin, and who could blame them?

There were over 60k votes for the illustrious middle name option, while the other, inferior, choices copped between 7.5k and 14.5k votes. A valiant effort, but no match for the glory of Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin.

The legal change will mean leaving behind his real middle name, which is Carson. His parents chose it as a  tribute to American frontiersman Kit Carson, however Macaulay admitted in a recent interview with Jimmy Fallon that he found his name sounded a bit too “Irish”.

“I was staring at my passport recently and I was looking over my middle name, my current middle name is Carson – you have to say it Macaulay Carson Culkin (with an Irish accent) – and I thought, ‘I should probably spruce up my name a little bit,’” he said.

“So, (I could be) Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin. If somebody comes up to me at the airport and says, ‘Excuse me, are you Macaulay Culkin?’ I can go, ‘Macaulay Culkin is my middle name.’”

The other options had various inspirations including his own brother Kieran Culkin’s suggestion, The Macca’s McRib burger, and his girlfriend Brenda Song suggesting the self-aware option ‘Publicity Stunt’, which was a strong contender in my opinion.

But cheers to Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin – who better show us the legal proof that this name change is legit.

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