Bleats

Jon Snow Would've Totally Died In The Game Of Thrones Finale Had The Writers Stuck To Their Original Plan

An OG character would've lived and the finale would've likely been very different.

SPOILERS FOR THE FINAL SEASON OF GAME OF THRONES AHEAD!

YOU’VE BEEN WARNED!

Now that Game of Thrones is finally over (to the relief of many disappointed fans), we’ve been inundated with a treasure trove of behind-the-scenes stuff from the cast and crew, like Maisie Williams’ one regret about the finale.

However, the most intriguing tidbit to have come out so far is what the writers originally had planned for Ser Jorah Mormont, who died valiantly defending Daenerys from the Night King’s army.

In a new chat to Entertainment WeeklyThrones writer Dave Hill revealed that the original plan was to keep Jorah alive and have him be banished alongside Jon Snow up North at The Wall.

Now this is a very interesting divergence from Jorah’s eventual fate but the writers ultimately scrapped it because that ending was rife with logistical and characterisation problems.

Not only would Jorah have had to do something incredibly crazy in order to be banished to the Wall in the first place, it would’ve been difficult to squeeze the end of Jorah’s story into three already-stuffed episodes as he would’ve had to believably go from fierce Daenerys supporter to Queen deserter following her destruction of King’s Landing.

And lastly, having Jorah and Jon in the same vicinity of each other after the latter had killed Daenerys will almost certainly end with at least one of them dead. Just think about it, there’s no way Jorah would pass up an opportunity to kill Jon and avenge Daenerys’ death given his loyalty and love for her.

Imagine this scene but with Jorah cutting down Jon with the sword instead.

The question of how Jorah would’ve reacted to Daenerys’ destruction of King’s Landing is a very interesting one as it throws up a bunch of intriguing “what ifs”, but Iain Glen had the best answer to it, telling EW:

“There’s a sweetness in that because Jorah will never know what she did. That’s probably best. It’s a blessing for him that he never found out what happened to her.

“And from a pragmatic story point of view, his death served a greater purpose. Where could we have taken Jorah from there? F— if I know.”

Glen has a good point there and Jorah dying while defending the woman he loves is a far more fitting way for the character to go out than having him stick around.

And besides, if you thought the fans were mad with the ending then having Jorah going up North with Jon and murdering him out of revenge would’ve made everyone apoplectic.

The Stray Plastic Bottles In The Game Of Thrones Finale Raises Much Bigger Concerns About The Stars’ Welfare

And let's not even get started on the environmental implications for Westeros.

SPOILERS FOR THE FINALE OF GAME OF THRONES!

YOU’VE BEEN WARNED!

It’s over folks. After eight long years, Game of Thrones is finally over and boy did we get some finale. But for all the work that went into making said finale – and you can tell that many hours were spent putting it together – it seems like the talented crew on that show aren’t immune to the occasional little slip up.

After that little goof with the stray coffee cup on the Winterfell set, someone has followed it up by leaving not one but two plastic bottles on the Dragonpit set during the finale’s big scene where Westeros’ most important people figure out who should be their next king/queen.

Aside from this seemingly confirming that Westeros is perhaps more technologically advanced than we all expected and the environmental implications this potentially has on the Seven Six Kingdoms, the presence of these plastic bottles has us at GOAT most worried about the stars’ welfare.

Specifically, we’re worried about their bladders.

It’s been well documented that the incredibly-detailed costumes worn by the actors in Thrones are uncomfortable, heavy, cumbersome, and sometimes all of the above. So with everyone needing to keep hydrated while all suited up in those admittedly great-looking outfits, how exactly do they, you know, pee?

That’s…a good point.

If there’s anything we’ve learned about costuming in period movies and shows it’s that it takes many hours to get in and out of an outfit, meaning that toilet breaks aren’t as simple as taking five minutes to duck out to the bathroom and water consumption has to be strategic and limited.

What these goofs in the finale tells us is that John Bradley (Samwell Tarly) and Liam Cunningham (Ser Davos Seaworth) tempted fate by keeping themselves hydrated during the filming of the finale and potentially ruined their bladders (and possibly their outfits) in the process.

It makes us wonder who else on the Thrones cast have pushed their bladders to breaking point during filming.

That’s not acting.

There’s a lot to unpack in the finale but let’s just spare a thought for the poor production crew who will undoubtedly cop a heap of flak from the internet for those stray plastic bottles, the actors and actress’s bladders, and the poor people working in costume department who have to maintain those sullied outfits every day.

Today I Learned: The Red Wedding In Game Of Thrones Was Actually Based On Real-Life Events

Except with fewer direwolves and more killing involved.

Over the course of eight seasons,  six direwolves, two dragons, and a body count that will make Genghis Khan weep with envy, Game of Thrones has had its fair share of powerful gut-wrenching moments.

But the one moment that will forever remain as the show’s most shocking is undoubtedly the Red Wedding. Much has happened since that event but the trauma of hearing the “Rains of Castamere” being played followed by the massacre of Robb Stark, Catelyn Stark, Talisa (and her unborn baby) and all the Stark forces will forever be burned into our heads.

You and millions of others probably had some strong things to say about George R.R. Martin and how he could possibly come up with something so horrific in his head. Well, he did come up with the Red Wedding but it wasn’t without precedent as it was actually based on a couple of horrific real-life events that unfolded very similarly.

Oh no…

When asked about his inspiration for the Red Wedding, Martin revealed that he had conceived it during the very early stages of the planning of A Song Of Ice And Fire and was inspired by two events that occurred in Scottish history back in the 15th and 17th centuries.

The first was an event ominously called the “Black Dinner”, which took place in 1440 and involved the then-almighty Douglas famly. At the time the Douglases wielded considerable power and influence, so much so that they were seen as a threat to the stability of the nation.

To “fix” this, it is said that the 16-year-old William Douglas, 6th Earl of his clan, and his younger brother were invited to dine with the 10-year-old King James II of Scotland. While the “Rains of Castamere” wasn’t played during the dinner, a black bull’s head, which symbolised death, was brought in and put before William as a single drum was beating in the background. The two Douglas brothers were then taken out and beheaded, presumably after dessert.

Not exactly the most honourable way to treat your guests.

That’s just rude.

The second event that inspired the Red Wedding was called the “Massacre of Glencoe,” which took place in 1692.

Similar to the Black Dinner, this event involved some Scottish clans who were getting a bit too powerful for the nation’s liking and could rebel against the newly installed King William III of England (and II of Scotland) at any time.

In response to this perceived threat, Williams supporter Captain Robert Campbell took 120 soldiers and went to Glencoe to seek hospitality from the MacDonald clan, who were seen as the biggest threats. After 12 days of getting spoiled by their hosts, Campbell and his men attacked the MacDonalds and basically massacred everyone. Those who escaped didn’t survive much longer as they succumbed to exposure from the cold Winter.

Good lord, this whole plan sounds like something Joffrey would do if he was, you know, smart and calculating as well as cruel rather than just idiotic and cruel.

I just wanted an excuse to use this gif again.

There are obvious differences between the Red Wedding, the Black Dinner, and the Massacre at Glencoe but all three events carry the same gist. All involved betraying the sacred rules of hospitality, much food and drink was consumed, and there was so much killing that the Grim Reaper had to put in overtime.

Even without magic, the White Walkers, direwolves, and dragons, it turns out that life is still stranger than fiction, especially back in the Medieval days.

So before anyone gets too judgy about how messed up Game of Thrones can be, just know that real life history is somehow even more twisted than anything George R.R. Martin could ever come up with in his head.

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