I will be the first person to admit I have a chocolate problem. Not that I think chocolate is a problem, it’s a solution. But if it came down to me choosing Nutella or a bath, I would probably choose Nutella. Hence, a problem.
I would happily eat chocolate for every single meal bar one: breakfast. I refuse to have chocolate for breakfast because, and this may come as a shock to some, chocolate is not a breakfast food.
I love Nutella but it doesn’t belong on toast. It belongs smeared over waffles with vanilla ice-cream or on a silver spoon while I eat it from the jar.
Chocolate croissants, scones and porridge should not be eaten in the morning either.
Actually, no food with a sugar content as high as your dessert should be eaten before 12pm. This means pancakes those pancakes you went to get because they’re rainbow coloured and have fairy floss on them are out.
So are those waffles with icing sugar and that french toast that’s covered in maple syrup. I don’t care if it has bacon on it, it should not be eaten as your first meal of the day.
Cereals are a tricky one. Technically they’re a breakfast food- they’re designed specifically to have with milk and start your day with an energy kick.
But cereals have developed over the years from full of fibre to full of cellulite, diabetes and artery clogging badness.
Oreo’s new cereal has marshmallows in it- marshmallows. When did pillows of pure sugar become an acceptable breakfast food?
Never. The answer is never.
Australia just did a re-evaluation of it’s Health Star Rating (HSR) system and, honestly, the findings when it came to cereals are pretty bad.
The cereals we think are ‘healthy’ like Kellogg’s Nutri Grain and Nestle Milo (I repeat, chocolate is not for breakfast) have a lot more added sugar than they do naturally occurring sugars. Which means they’re more likely to rot your teeth than assist you on your health kick.
When rated using the new health star algorithm, Nutri Grain, Milo and Uncle Tobys Plus Protein cereals all dropped from a HSR of 4 to 1.5.
This legitimises my point: the more sugar there is in your breakfast the less good it is for you which means you shouldn’t be eating it.
I’m not saying ever. I would be a hypocrite if I said that- I love me some sugar. Chocolate problem, remember?
But it’s about not forming bad habits by excusing sugary foods as breakfast foods- pancakes smothered in syrup and berry compote are a dessert even if the menu tells you otherwise.
Stop hoovering dessert for breakfast, for goodness sake.
It’s no fun to eat if for breakfast anyway: why have it a 9am sitting in your dining room when you can go out for a gelato or freshly bakes crêpes after dinner?