After much hooplah and ridiculous NDAs muzzling people from talking about his jokes, Pete Davidson’s stand-up special, Alive From New York, is out on Netflix. He could’ve done with a better title though, like BDE Rants About Ariana Grande, because a solid chunk of his set was dedicated to roasting his ex in an incredibly (thought not unjustified) manner.
Speaking of roasting people, the GOAT team unpack the ridiculous feud between Gigi Hadid and renowned internet idiot Jake Paul on ‘It’s Been A Big Day For…’ below:
Pete Davidson has spoken about his relationship with Ariana Grande on various occasions following the end of their whirlwind romance but his Netflix special was perhaps the first time he spoke of her in a no holds barred fashion.
He kicks off his salty Ariana Grande rant by referencing the time he made fun of then-congressional candidate Dan Crenshaw on SNL and threw shade at his ex by joking: “I did make that guy famous and a household name for no reason, right? I did what Ariana Grande did for me. Yes, I sucked his dick at SNL.”
Yep. That basically set the tone for the next 10 or so minutes as the the floodgates opened.
After admitting that he didn’t initially plan on talking about the “Pete Davidson/Ariana Grande trainwreck”, Pete changed his mind after his friend said she dated him as a “distraction” and justified it by saying. “She has her songs and stuff and this [Netflix special] is what I have.”
Anticipating potential backlash for saying this sort of stuff about Ariana, Pete defended his rant by pointing out how she talked about him to Vogue.
“You’re like, ‘Pete, this isn’t fair. You’re airing out dirty laundry. How could you do that? Where did she say this stuff? To her friends in the confidence of her own home?’ No, she said it on the cover of Vogue magazine.”
“Can you imagine if I did that? My career would be over tomorrow if I spray painted myself brown and hopped on the cover of Vogue magazine and just started sh*tting on my ex.”
Pete then added how Ariana got virtually no repercussions from their break-up while he got called ” butt-hole eyes from Barstoolsports.com.” Okay, fair point and a pretty funny one at that.
Pete continued his Ariana Grande rant by pointing out how she is a “genius” with another genuinely pretty funny bit about how his buddies couldn’t help but love her hit single, ‘Thank U, Next’, when they were supposed to be consoling him post-break up. Even his own grandpa called it “a slap”.
The whole Ariana roast goes down another funny route when Pete aired his grievances over how he hated how “Ariana talked all this sh*t on behalf of [his] dick” and the subsequent “Pete Davidson has BDE” furor that erupted.
Pete jokes how he’d get cancelled if he said something like that and how she has “tiny little hands” so everything “looks big to her”, before circling back to how he said Ariana Grande was a “genius” by saying the reason she said all that stuff about the “Pete Davidson BDE” was so that “every girl that sees [his] dick for the rest of [his] life is disappointed.”
He then caps it off by roasting roasting himself, joking how he “didn’t even get to enjoy his Big Dick summer or whatever the f**k it was called” before pleading (jokingly) to stop talking about his his dick and the “Pete Davidson has BDE” stuff for the sake of his family and poor mother.
As salty as Pete Davidson sounds – and there was enough salt to outdo the Dead Sea – it’s not that unjustified. After all, if Ariana Grande could air out her dirty laundry in Vogue and in her music, why couldn’t he air his out on the stand-up stage?
Granted that this probably isn’t the most mature thing for either party to do but hey, they say write what you know and to make lemonade out of lemons. Pete Davidson did exactly that and got a pretty funny Netflix special out of it.
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