Bleats

Henry Cavill's Shirtless Scene Routine For 'The Witcher' Sounds Awfully Dangerous

Getting Rivia's arse looking just right takes an unhealthy, almost life-threatening effort.

It’s been a long wait but the The Witcher is finally out on Netflix and you know what that means: sword fights, fantasy, sexposition, and Henry Cavill looking like a buff Legolas who is occasionally shirtless or naked in a bathtub.

Basically there’s a lot of Henry Cavill, naked or otherwise, to look forward to.

Now you’d think that a fit bloke like Henry wouldn’t have a problem getting his kit off for a big-budget Netflix TV show like The Witcher. But as it turns out, doing a shirtless scene is far more difficult – and dangerous – than simply taking off your shirt, doing a few push ups and getting in a bathtub.

Appearing on The Graham Norton Show, Henry spilled the tea on the amount of physical work he had to put in for The Witcher, saying that getting super buff is actually practical in helping to stay healthy and prevent injuries when doing highly-physical stuntwork, as well as looking great without a shirt on.

As for how filming shirtless scenes go, things get far more dicey as Henry says he has to dehydrate himself for three days prior to shooting the scene in order to get that muscular look we all thirst over (no pun intended).

Hats off to the likes of Henry Cavill and Kumail Nanjiani for shedding some honest light on the realities behind looking swole in Hollywood productions because there’s a lot more going on behind-the-scenes than we think. It’s only sustainable for them because it’s literally their job to look that way and they get paid to do it.

Between going for three days with almost no water just to get Rivia’s arse looking just right for a shirtless scene and being miserable or looking bloated but hydrated and happy, I’d opt for the latter every time. That’s probably why Netflix pays Henry Cavill the big bucks and not me.

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Rihanna Is Just Messing With Us About Her New Album Now, Isn't She?

Her Instagram posts don't leave much to the imagination.

Rihanna has been mega-busy becoming a fashion mogul with her Fenty clothing line over the last few years, but fans have been eagerly awaiting for the day she finally turns her attention back to music and releases that ninth album we’ve been frothing for.

Well after a long period of time of not talking about R9 (which is what we’re calling Rihanna’s ninth album from here on out), the singer finally dropped a hint about it on Instagram.

Well, hint is perhaps being generous because it’s more a straight up troll post about R9. Instead of cryptic artwork or even a date, RiRi shared a video of a dog rocking out alongside the caption: “update: me listening to R9 by myself and refusing to release it.”

At a time when things like ASAP Rocky’s alleged sex tape and some idiot YouTuber Logan Paul’s alleged sex tape are leaking left and right, somehow Rihanna’s new album managed to escape unscathed.

The universe does some weird things at times and RiRi’s Instagram post has got us questioning something: Is Rihanna just messing with us about R9 at this point in time? Does the album even exist?

But perhaps this Instagram post is the best way of addressing all the speculation over R9. Fans have been asking Rihanna when her next album is coming for ages, most recently in 2018 when a fan asked and she answered “2019”, and this video of the headbanging dog sort of answers the question without really saying anything noteworthy.

Smart

Of course, R9 could also be nothing but a working title for an entirely different project that’s unrelated to music (like for Fenty or something) and Rihanna is merely generating hype for that. At the end of the day though, only RiRi knows what R9 is and when it is coming so we’ll just have to wait and see what happens.

Having said all that though, the GOAT team have a feeling that Rihanna has something planned on or around New Year’s Eve so watch this space. You heard it here first.

Always be in the loop with our snackable podcast breaking the biggest story of the day. Subscribe to It’s Been A Big Day For… on your favourite podcast app.

Pixar Films Are Filled With Terrifying Implications That You Likely Missed On Your First Watch

Apply real-life logic to Pixar movies is a recipe for ruined childhoods.

Pixar are the masters of making super cute movies that also pack an emotional wallop. It’s easy to be tricked into not thinking too hard about the mechanics of the studio’s films given how cute and brightly coloured they all look, but perhaps that’s by design.

Because when we decided to apply some real-life logic to Pixar movies like Frozen, Tangled, and Ratatouille, the implications were outright horrifying on a “ruined your childhood” level.

Sorry to ruin it for everyone.

Frozen

When we first meet Kristoff and Sven in Frozen, they’re just a young kid and reindeer calf respectively. Nothing bad so far. But when the film fast-forwards 13 years to the present, things get a little dicey.

At this point of Frozen‘s story, Sven is about 13-14 years old, which is not that old in human years. But in reindeer years, that’s ancient as a male reindeer’s average life expectancy is only about 15-ish years old.

That means Sven should either be dead or close to meeting the grim reaper. Unless the older Sven we see is an entirely new reindeer whom Kristoff also decided to name Sven. That doesn’t make it any better actually.

Tangled

One of the best recurring gags in Tangled is Rapunzel’s frying pan. Not only does it prove to be a useful weapon in combat, it quickly becomes everyone’s tool of choice because, well, nothing beats smacking someone over the head with a piece of solid iron.

Speaking of smacking someone over the head, sure it’s funny to see Flynn Rider cop a frying pan or two to the noggin’ but all that hilarity quickly dissipates when you realise that’s a first class ticket to some serious head trauma.

When Flynn gets smacked over the head by Rapunzel for the first time, there’s a 99 percent chance he’s got some traumatic brain damage and there’s no way he’s getting up again. But that would lead to a far more boring movie so of course Flynn is inexplicably okay when he should realistically be heading for the hospital ASAP.

Maybe characters in the Pixar universe have harder-than-average skulls.

Yeah… he ain’t gonna be getting up from a blow like that.

Ratatouille

Given how Remy and his father are still alive at the end of the film, we can safely assume that Ratatouille‘s pint-sized protagonist is an adult rat. However, it also means Remy won’t have much longer to live and run his popular new restaurant.

The average lifespan of a wild rat is only *checks notes* about a year and even properly bred pet rats don’t live for more than a couple of years. So realistically, Remy’s dad shouldn’t be alive and Remy only has a few months of cooking left in his life.

This probably explains why there’s no sequel to Ratatouille, poor Remy would be close to the pearly gates by the time the next story picks up.

Better enjoy what little time you got left, little fella.

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