Everything I Want Netflix To Spend Their $25 Billion Budget On

Just imagine, Veronica Mars, but on Mars.

Netflix has a ridiculous amount of money, we all knew this. But what you might not know, is just how much money this streaming-service actually has. In news that will blow your mind, it was just announced that Netflix will be spending billions more than they did last year. 

A new report from BMO Capital Markets predicts that the streaming-service will invest approximately $25 billion AUD into content this year. That’s a whole lot of Netflix and Chill. 

Given the critical success of films like Marriage Story and The Irishman, and the commercial success of The Good Place and The Crown, it’s no wonder Netflix is spending more money on content. It’s not just what they do best, it’s what they do! 

But until that content comes out, I’m forced to contemplate what Netflix can do with that insane amount of money. Here are some things that I would like:

A Harry Potter Reboot, Led By Ryan Murphy

Imagine these dance moves, but more.

Can you just imagine how fun a Harry Potter reboot would be if it had the campness of Ryan Murphy’s direction? Not to mention, the musical numbers would be off the chain! “You’re A Wizzard Harry” would absolutely go off on the ARIA charts and you know it. 

A High-Budget Round The Twist Revamp, Starring Lady Gaga

*ARTPOP plays in the background*

For most of us, Round The Twist was the show that scared us more than anything else in the world. It was an after-school nightmare wrapped up in a tight little package on ABC Kids. Oh, and there was the epic theme song as well.

I think that it’s time this weird-but-wonderful show got a revamp for the next generation, starring the one-and-only enigma, Lady Gaga. How crazy would that be? I’m getting chills just thinking about it. 

A Friends X Seinfield Crossover Reboot

This, but the Friends cast are also dancing.

There’s a lot of debate about which of these shows is funnier than the other. Hence, the only way to solve this debate is by putting them on the same show, pay them an obscene amount of money and observe who makes you laugh harder. Considering Veep has now wrapped up all filming and the Friends cast keep hanging out together, the timing couldn’t be better. 

That’s So Suite Life Of Hannah Montana 2, directed by Wes Anderson

Oh snap.

Speaking of crossovers, I am definitely expecting a revamp of the most iconic Disney Channel crossover. That’s So Suite Life Of Hannah Montana was the crossover between shows: That’s So Raven, Suite Life of Zach & Cody and Hannah Montana, and it was awesome. Now, imagine this, with the quirky direction from Wes Anderson. You’re welcome.

Veronica Mars, But On Mars

Next shot: Aliens.

Now, Netflix is going to have to buy this show off Stan but, we think that’s well within their budget. Further, now that Kristen Bell has finished up on The Good Place, it couldn’t be a better time to bring back this iconic character in a new setting. C’mon, you know you want to see her snarky sense of humour in space! Just think of her sassy interaction with all the aliens.

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'High School Musical: The Musical: The Series' Is A Celebration Of Cringe TV

It’s The Start Of Something New For Disney

High School Musical: The Musical: The Series is cringe, there’s no doubt about it. It’s a comedy-musical tv show, aimed at pre-teens that tries to do what Glee did for a woke audience, all-the-while using the legacy of the High School Musical trilogy.

Not to mention, the High School Musical legacy was always going to be a force that was hard to live up to. We’re talking about the launchpad of Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens’ careers. We’re talking about two made-for-tv films, one major motion picture, one concert DVD, one American tour and a merchandising phenomenon that had kids hooked.

Damn straight Troy.

Against all odds, this television-series reboot, with a whole new set of characters, a new cast and a new timeline became iconic in its own right. Now, there are many reasons for this. 

Fierce dancing to start!

You could attest its success to its fun, mockumentary-style format or the incredible vocal talent coming from its young cast. However, for me, the main reason why I praise this Disney+ original is for two characters in particular, Carlos and Seb.

Carlos and Seb are two shy, queer students at East High. However, unlike other LGBTQIA+ narratives in popular television shows, their characters are filled to the brim with nothing but positive energy. There’s no outright bullying towards them, there’s no sadness. In fact, Seb has an overtly supportive family that books out three throws of bleachers on opening night.  

Just look at this icon!

Additionally, what is truly beautiful and refreshing to see with these two characters, is that their sexuality comes second-hand; it doesn’t define who they are. The two are introduced in their own plots and only become an item after their characters are firmly established with the audience. As a member of the LGBTQIA+ community myself, it was nice to see two characters that weren’t defined by their sexuality, nor did they try to represent the whole community.

Representation done right!

On the subject, the showrunner of the series, Tim Federle, said: “This is a story that would have changed my life if I had seen it when I was a kid… and the reason it would have changed my life is because it’s no big deal. It’s actually just real life.”

Excellent stuff Federle.

Incredible stuff. It’s no wonder the show was nominated for a GLAAD Media Award in 2020 for Outstanding Kids & Family Programming.

All-in-all, the show may have its cringe moments (and believe me, there are a lot of those), but at the end of the day, this show is beautiful. And I suggest you give it a watch.

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Britney Spears Thinks She’s Picasso, Launches Art Exhibition In France

All around the world, painting girls.

On October 14th, 2017, Britney Spears broke the internet. Not because she had released new music or announced a relationship update, but because of a new hobby she’d picked up. This date marks the day that the Princess of Pop officially threw music in the backburner in favor of painting. 

Now, the “Toxic” singer joins the likes of Picasso and Leonardo Da Vinci, with her own exhibit happening in France. No, we’re not joking. The infamous painting of flowers is getting a world-class debut in the contemporary art gallery Galerie Sympa, located in the area of Figeac, France. So, if you’re in the area make sure you head on down between 6pm and 9pm. 

A statement made by the museum said, “We’re thrilled to announce that we will be opening @britneyspears first solo show in a contemporary art gallery.” The exhibition is titled “Sometimes You Just Gotta Play” in order to reflect the Instagram caption from that initial painting video. 

The art gallery announcing the apt title.

While the transition from singer to painter may be shocking to some, the signs have been there all along.

Since the release of Glory in 2016, Britney has been notably silent from the music industry, but her Instagram posts have been louder than ever. From game-changing vlogs to runway struts, from fitness videos to minion memes, Britney Spears has shifted focus to visuals. And we can not get enough. 

My actual face when I scroll through Britney’s feed.

Will this exhibition make its way down to the NGV, the Art Gallery of NSW or any of the other museums down under? We sure hope so!

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