Bleats

James Charles Has Proven One Thing - He Doesn't Know How To Flirt At All

Sis got no game.

If you’re a mature adult, you’re probably not across the James Charles x Tati Westbrook drama. You probably don’t even know who the hell they are.

Lucky for you, I am not a mature adult and I am fully across the drama and here to fill you in.

Basically, James and Tati are both YouTubers. They used to be besties (despite their almost 20 year age gap) but James promoted a product that was a big competitor of Tati’s and so the saga began.

Tati, being the mature 37-year-old woman she is, posted an exposé video of sorts on her Youtube calling out James on a bunch of things, including accusing him of manipulating straight men.

Now, that’s a big call and definitely one I can’t speak on. But what I can say is a little crush and sometimes even a little flirting never hurt nobody.

The ‘feud’ between the two YouTubers has caused James to lose millions of subscribers on his channel and Tati to gain a lot.

Basically it’s a lot of he-said-she-said high school-type B.S that the world has blown way out of proportion.

Honestly, I find it kind of funny. It’s great entertainment value (not even gonna deny that I’m invested) but that’s all it is. One person and bunch of screenshots cannot speak to the entire history and character of another person.

What screenshots CAN speak to, however, is a person’s flirting ability. And James Charles has none. Zero. Zip. Sis has NO game whatsoever.

Male model Jay Alvarez posted a screenshot of a conversation her had with James earlier this year and it’s hilariously bad.

@James, you need to work on your pickup lines.

First of all, “hi daddy” is not subtle whatsoever. Like…no.

And the whole middle part is giving me anxiety. I’m getting horrible flashbacks to when I was 15 and messaging my crush on MSN in a way that they wouldn’t know they were my crush but so they would totally know they were my crush and would eventually ask me out so we could fall madly in love.

Ya feel?

Memories.

Cue James who f’s up the subtly factor again by saying he slid into Jay’s DMs because “lmao you’re hot.”

DUDE. WHAT. ARE. YOU. DOING.

If you want to flirt with guys (gay, straight, or other) that’s your prerogative but at least be good at it.

We hope you learn your lesson James Charles: learn how to flirt. Or be screenshotted and shamed.

Lol no.

P.S. props to Jay for handling the unwanted flirting with kindness.

There's A Simple Solution To Make Sure Your Family Will Stop Grilling You About Dates

Need me one of these.

There’s two types of geniuses in the world.

There’s the I’m good at maths and can do code in my head kind. And then there’s the kind who create pamphlets.

Now I know pamphlets aren’t exactly exciting and definitely don’t require genius work, but stay with me here because I’m not just talking about any old pamphlet.

The pamphlet in question was specially designed to answer all the annoying questions asked by family members ahead of the date. Revolutionary.

“More questions? Don’t.”

REVOLUTIONARY I TELL YOU.

The pamphlet designer in question is Mary Beth Barone, who is also the new love of my life. She’s 27, lives in New York, and spoke to Buzzfeed News about the inspiration behind the pamphlet:

“I wasn’t sure how to play it with all the family around so I was lamenting to my one sister I told because I knew there would be a lot of questions,” she told the publication.

Barone said her sister joked about “mak[ing] a pamphlet,” and she decided to follow through.

“I created a doc and thus the pamphlet was born,” she said.

Ah to be inside the mind of a genius.

Sounds about right.

I do have one word of advice for Mary though (from one genius to another, ya know): patent the hell out of that idea. Then sell the hell out of it on Etsy or something because, I’m telling you, it will make you millions.

Okay, not millions, but I’m certain there’s a market in this. Nosey family members are the worst and passive aggressive techniques to shut them down are the best. Your pamphlet tackles both of these things perfectly and you really should do yourself a solid and sell some copies.

Or at least do me a solid and sell some copies, ‘cause I need one in my life please and thank you.

American Alex Is Living Proof That Nice Guys Finish Last And We Just Don't Know Why

Friend-zoned.

Finding a good partner in a world of arseholes is damn hard work.

I’m convinced there’s a whole sub-race of people, particularly women, who have a disease that disables them from choosing a positive, supportive other half.

Apparently, the female race is allergic to guys who are sweet, caring and in touch with their emotions.

But I have a reality check for you girls: just because a guy isn’t afraid to cry or talk about his feelings, doesn’t make him less of a man (whatever that means, anyway). It makes him MORE of a man.

It makes him more likely to think before he acts, more likely to treat you how you deserve to be treated, and more likely to be honest with you.

It makes him LESS likely to bait you, less likely to disrespect your physical boundaries, and less likely to B.S straight to your face.

Who wouldn’t want that?

Why do we not want that?

Me right now.

Reality TV isn’t the greatest thing in the world- often it’s full of moments that make you want to gouge your brain out and scream “WHAT THE …?!”. But the current season of Bachelor In Paradise Australia is teaching us a thing or two about relationships.

I never thought I would say you should take dating advice from a TV show but, ladies, you should take advice from a TV show.

Well, kinda. You should use Bachelor In Paradise as an example of what NOT to do.

One of the show’s contestants, American Alex, is a textbook example of an under-appreciated guy. He has a kind peaceful energy, is softly spoken, candid and looks like this:

Yet the girls on the show are too busy throwing themselves at other (less kind) contestants.

The nice guy, once again, has finished last.

I have a bunch of theories about this.

The first, I already mentioned: ‘feminine’ guys are a turn off. They’re not actually, but that definitely seems to be what the world thinks.

I personally am baffled by this. A guy, or girl for that matter, that thinks they need to be strong and stoic all the time will not adequately serve you emotionally. The physical side of a relationship is important but that can only get you so far. Eventually, you’re going to have to talk about things, and brick walls aren’t good at talking.

Stop thinking into it. Sweet guys are just that, sweet. I would choose an open and loving partner any day.

My second theory is that society has convinced us that relationships SHOULD be difficult. Divorce rates are up, being a sarcastic arsehole is in, so women expect to have to fight for what they want.

Fighting for what you want isn’t a bad thing, but fighting WITH a partner is.

YOUR RELATIONSHIP SHOULD NOT BE A STRUGGLE. It should be the thing that helps ease your struggles.

What she said.

And theory number three: easy relationships are boring relationships and that’s no fun.

This one is also not true. Just because you can laugh with your partner, talk about your problems like adults, and be honest about your feelings doesn’t mean things are boring. It means you can have fun more often without the fear of imploding.

You know, be a pain without worrying he’ll tell all his mates about it. Wear no makeup without worrying he’ll cheat on you with your best friend. Go to the shops or on a date and not fear you’ll butt heads again.

Easy is not boring. Boring is boring.

Finally, I think a lot of women just don’t believe they deserve to be happy. I get it- I’d be lying if I said I had the negative voices in my head perfectly in check. But that doesn’t mean I’ve given up on myself. And it certainly doesn’t mean I’m willing to deal with a guy who doesn’t respect me.

I deserve more than that. You deserve more than that.

Bad boys are not all they’re cracked up to be. Sure, leather jackets and tattoos are hard to resist, but a big heart is a much more valuable asset.

It’s time the nice guys finally moved up in the race.

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