Christmas is 33 DAYS away. That is just enough time to cancel all your plans and get stuck into some classic Netflix Xmas movies.
This year, the popular streaming platform has listened to our cravings for more cheesy Christmas content and doubled down on the festive films. There are 17 (!!) Christmas flicks coming to Netflix just in time for the silly season.
So, without further adieu, here’s a ranking of most of those Netflix Xmas movies, from most to least likely to give you diabetes.
1. Dear Santa
Wow, wow, wow, wow. Dear Santa looks like steaming hot pile of crap, but yessir, it’s a four cheese gnocchi with extra parm.
According to IMDb, Dear Santa is about “a young woman who comes from a life of privilege who falls from the owner of a soup kitchen after discovering a Dear Santa letter written by his seven-year-old daughter.”
I mean – need I say more?
2. A Holiday Engagement
Here’s the premise of A Holiday Engagement, according to IMDb: “Afraid to tell her family she’s been dumped, Hillary hires an actor to play her fiance during a four-day Thanksgiving weekend at her parents’ house.”
This looks hella cheesy, but it’s important to note the date this Netflix Xmas movie was released. A Holiday Engagement came out in 2011 but my god does the trailer make it look like it was made in the late ‘90s.
Everything from the fashion to the technology and the FuNky background music give A Holiday Engagement that gooey, cheesy vibe, perfect for a Boxing Day hangover.
3. Holiday In The Wild
KRISTIN DAVIS. ROB LOWE. LEGENDS! In short, the pair end up on a safari, Kristin Davis takes pity on an orphaned baby elephant, Rob Lowe gets his shirt off and the whole thing gets very Eat Pray Love at an elephant sanctuary.
Will it be good? Probably not. Will it probably make me cry? Abso-bloody-lutely it will.
4. Christmas Crush
Immediately, the trailer for Christmas Crush makes you think you’re watching a sequel to Mean Girls. We see Jonathan Benett AKA Aaron Samuels followed by a Christmas-themed on-stage performance and it’s like we’re rooting for the demise of The Plastics all over again.
The film follows Georgia, who thinks she’s getting a second chance at love with her high school crush, but is blindsided by unexpected attraction to her best friend after the school reunion.
5. A Cinderella Story: Christmas Wish
If you came here for a sequel to the Hilary Duff classic A Cinderella Story I’m terribly sorry to break it to you, but A Christmas Wish is not that.
Long story short, Kat, an aspiring singer-songwriter is treated like a servant by her vain stepmother and self-involved stepsisters until she meets Nick, the handsome new santa at the tree lot. Can Kat’s friends and a ‘little holiday magic’ make her the Cinderella she deserves to be? We’ll just have to wait and see!
The only thing cheesier than the storyline of A Christmas Wish is the background music.
6. Let It Snow
Let It Snow has already received rave reviews and is even being hailed as Love Actually for teens – but is it really that great?
Like Love Actually, Let It Snow follows the stories of different people who are brought together by fate. The only difference is, they’re teens and the dialogue is truly cringeworthy.
However if you’re after diabete-inducing cheesiness, Let It Snow delivers.
7. The Christmas Candle
Get your horse n’ carriage ready because The Christmas Candle is a religious period piece!
The Christmas Candle is about a pastor who, after suffering loss, accepts a position in a town that believes in a Christmas miracle candle, which he wants to abolish.
Oh – and it stars Britain’s Got Talent alumni SUSAN BOYLE. Sadly, I don’t think Susan is going to be enough to stop me snoring through The Christmas Candle on a drowsy Sunday eve.
8. Christmas In The Heartland
Christmas In The Heartland is about Kara and Jessie, two teenagers from very different worlds who (with a little Christmas magic!) find out they have more in common than expected.
Is it just me, or is this giving you major Parent Trap vibes? Christmas In The Heartland has just enough no-name actors to give it that cheesy, nothing else to watch appeal, but at the same time, it could actually be a pretty decent movie.
9. Santa Girl
It’s pretty hard not to giggle while watching the trailer for Santa Girl – it’s hard to believe it came out this year.
The film is all about Santa’s actual daughter, who gets a chance to attend college for one semester in the ‘real world’ before heading back to the North Pole to fulfil her duties under her father.
The cheesy special effects, and to be honest, the entire premise of the film skyrocket it to record diabetes-inducing levels.
10. Christmas Break-In
OK, so Christmas Break-In is essentially Home Alone, but set in 2018 and featuring a girl instead of a boy in the place of Macauley Culkin.
If you’re with kids, it’ll be perfect. If you’re an adult, it could be a little boring. Sickly sweet score – 6/10.
11. Elliot The Littlest Reindeer
If you love cheesy Netflix Xmas movies, you’ve come to the right place. Elliot is a small but determined horse who travels to the North Pole to compete for a spot alongside the famous reindeer that pulls Santa’s sleigh.
It’s a classic underdog film, and it looks bloody cute, but I do have my reservations.
No shade to Elliot, or the other reindeers, but Elliot the Littlest Reindeer looks like it’s trying to be a Pixar or Disney movie, but doesn’t quite hit the mark.
12. Holly Star
Puppets, Christmas Trees, buried treasure, near-death experiences – all of the makings of a feel-good Christmas film, right? Wrong.
Holly Star is about a broke puppeteer who returns home for the holidays and gets caught up in a treasure hunt. On first appearances, Holly Star gives off major Bridesmaids vibes – it seems like a classic underdog movie before suddenly turning into full-blown mystery.
The trailer hits an all-time ridiculous high when the main character says, “if I can remember everything before my life flashed before my eyes…you’re going to have to kill me.” Well, that escalated.
This isn’t sweet, or cheesy, it’s just a bit random.
13. A Christmas Prince: The Royal Baby
Believe me, I wanted to find the cheesiness in A Christmas Prince: The Royal Baby, and it really does look the part from the outset, but within – it sounds like a pretty moving film.
The part where the pregnant Queen says, “I don’t know whether I’m ready to be a queen and a mum,” will truly hit you where it hurts the most.
14. Christmas Survival
Try as they like, it’s hard for the Brits to be cheesy, and Christmas Survival is proof of that.
IMDb says the movie follows two sisters and their families who spend (or rather, endure) Christmas at their late parents’ dilapidated country house. It’s a bit of good old fashioned slapstick humour and that self-deprecating kind of humour the British are known for.