In 1994, we were all blessed with what was, and still is, the greatest Christmas song of all time – Mariah Carey’s All I Want For Christmas Is You.
I for one remember singing into my hairbrush all Christmas long that year. A true banger.
But the USA seems to be MIA when it comes to Christmas cheer. It wasn’t until 2017 – 23 years after its release – that All I Want For Christmas even cracked the Top 10 of the US charts. And this year it’s hit an all-time high of #7.
Guys, come on, you need all the Christmas cheer you can get. Mariah is your saviour.
Since its release, All I Want For Christmas has sold more than 16 million copies and brought in over $80 million in royalties. So Mariah probably doesn’t care that you Americans don’t have her at number one.
But I do. Because in dissing that song, you’re also taking a swipe at Love Actually, the GREATEST CHRISTMAS MOVIE OF ALL TIME, and the only film Mariah has ever given permission for her blessed song to be used in. Official seal of approval my friends.
So America, I can only assume you hate Christmas. Because meanwhile, Down Under, we’re running with all the Christmas classics even though half the lyrics don’t even make sense because we’re baking in 40-degree heat while you’re off building snowmen.
Michael Buble’s Christmas album has been top of the Australian charts every Christmas since 2011 for heaven’s sake. We know how to celebrate the season. WITH BANGERS. Join the party already, America.