Bleats

Who Is This Hot Jacked American Dude On Bachelor In Paradise And Should We Trust Him?

We definitely like looking at him.

Bachelor in Paradise has officially kicked off and while it’s great to see old faves (Brooke) and old least-faves (Cat) back under Osher’s reign, it’s hard to look away from the international intruder: Alex Bordyukov.

Alex is a 30-year-old information systems supervisor and model from season 13 of the US Bachelorette. He’s 6’2”, he has an American accent with a tinge of Russian, he has a nice smile, and as Brittney aptly noted, he looks like he weighs his chicken.

Alex seems sweet, but in my experience, so do a lot of dudes. So before we get too caught up in his dreamy eyes and volumous hair, let’s dig a little into who exactly this beautiful man is and whether or not we should trust him just yet.

Let’s start with his Bachelorette experience. His arrival gimmick was to bring a vacuum, so we’re off to a weird start unless he’s very literally promising a life where he relieves the gendered reliance on women to do the lion’s share of household labour. A girl can dream!

As Alex volunteered, he was perhaps best known for giving a lap dance to a grandma on the Ellen show. The appearance on Ellen was a group date during The Bachelorette (making Australia look cheapo), and you can catch some of his shirtless dancing in this slightly creepy fan tribute video to Alex.

So we definitely *trust* that Alex looks good shirtless, like, wow, but what about past that smoking hot exterior? What have we got?

His Bachelorette Q&A gives us some info. He thinks his best traits are that he’s adaptable, logical and fun. These sound more relevant to a job interview than a dating show but at least we can be pretty sure that he is fun. His Instagram is definitely fun.

As is his spoof YouTube series, The Bachelor Budget Edition, where he mimics the show set up an a much smaller scale, to find himself a date to a wedding. It seems like he doesn’t take himself too seriously so he should fit into the Aussie taking-the-piss culture.

His self-proclaimed worst attributes are that he’s selfish, unemotional and unapologetic, so things aren’t looking good to be honest. You can be fun and jacked all you want but those bad qualities will be more important in an actual relationship.

The red flags continue. He once ate a live salamander. When asked to name his top three favourite musicians he named Coldplay, The Beatles and then couldn’t think of a third because “Music isn’t a big part of my life.” (?????)

Also his favourite “artist” is Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson.

But we bounce back! Maybe! He says he’s a romantic and likes to treat his significant other “like a queen”. I’ve heard this one before but I’m willing to stretch my imagination to believe this could be true for those abs!

“I like a woman that pursues me. I like an aggressive, go-getter type.” He said.

This will probably be suitable because everyone on the Bachelor in Paradise island is frothing on him and will likely pounce.

Overall, the jury is still out on whether we can trust Alex or not, but I’m dubious. Also if he ends up being lucky enough to get anywhere near Brooke and f**ks it up, Australia will roast him alive. That’s a promise.

Robert Pattinson Says He Smells Like A Crayon And I Need To Know Which Colour

Another wild yarn from R-Patz.

Robert Pattinson has gained quite a reputation for spinning wild yarns during interviews, but his most recent comments on his body odour have me truly shaken.

In a recent interview with Allure the star of the upcoming The Batman film said, “Lots of people tell me I smell like a crayon.”

The interviewer – understandably bewildered by this statement – then asked, “Like you’re made of wax?”

To which R-Patz responded, “Yes! Like I’m embalmed.”

I have so many questions. What colour crayon does Pattinson smell like? What brand? Is he using lots of crayons? And most importantly, who are these multiple people who are telling him he smells like crayon!? Is that an insult, or a compliment?

It’s not the first time Robert Pattinson’s scent has come up in conversation. Back in 2009, E! News reported that an unidentified source who worked “very closely” with the actor on New Moon said “he stinks.”

“I mean, it’s awful,” the source said. “He never showers, and it drives people on the set crazy.”

“He completely reeks,” an unidentified crew member added. Yikes.

It’s been over a decade since then, so we can only hope Robert Pattinson has swapped his lack of showering for an obsession with crayons. 

Speaking of celebrity scents, celebrity tattoo artist Lauren Winzer dishes on what Post Malone smells like on It’s Been A Big Day For…below:

During his interview with Allure, Pattinson was also asked about being recently named the “most handsome man” in the world according to science.

“It’s weird,” he said. “I never was really up for the good-looking-guy roles, because I’ve always been quite awkward when meeting people.”

“My Harry Potter role was a good-looking guy, and it was a shock that it was quite easy to get. And then in Twilight, [Edward is] beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. When I turned up for the auditions, I had done a job where I’d dyed my hair black, because I had an inch and a half of roots, and I had waxed my body. And then I had a few months where I’d been drinking beer all day, so I had this hairless, chubby body. I looked like a baby with a wig on.”

Hairless, chubby, waxed or smelling like a crayon – we’ll take Robert Pattinson any which way.

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