What’s not to love about Ariana Grande? She’s an outspoken feminist, she’s got an amazing voice, she’s strong AF and now she’s changing our dating lives for the better.
That’s right. Apparently, ‘Grand-ing’ is the new dating trend taking over and it’s inspired by ‘Thank U, Next’. Essentially, it’s about learning from your experiences with your ex and moving on, knowing you’re going to be totally fine without them.
In the song, Ariana names her exes as well as everything she learned from them:
“One taught me love, one taught me patience, and one taught me pain, now, I’m so amazing. I’ve loved and I’ve lost, but that’s not what I see. So, look what I got, look what you taught me.”
PlentyOfFish, a dating site in the US, did a survey that found 50 per cent of singles made it a point to follow Grande’s lead and let go of any negativity towards their exes.
Sara Ouimette, a therapist in California, spoke to HuffPost about how more of her clients want to remember the good memories of their relationships and then learn from the difficult ones.
She added the this is so they can go into their next relationship with a better understanding and approach to loving someone.
It’s sort of like the idea of ‘conscious uncoupling’ which was made famous by Gwyneth Paltrow when she split from Chris Martin. It essentially means that there doesn’t have to be ill will when a long-term relationship comes to an end.
Amy Baldwin, sex educator and co-host of the Shameless Sex podcast, added that while the idea of Grande-ing is great, you shouldn’t “bypass your hurt”.
“You have to feel all of the feels after a breakup. Sadness, anger, fear ― these emotions are here for a reason. The trick is to allow spaciousness to feel and move through all of the emotions and then looking back at our experiences and asking ‘what did I learn here?’”
Julia Bekker, a matchmaker and relationship coach in New York City, also spoke to the publication and said a breakup should make you “thankful that you are no longer spending time with someone who isn’t right for you so you can eventually focus on finding someone who is”.
“If you never learn you will find yourself in the same patterns, and if you do not enforce what you have learned you will not be able to have a successful outcome.”
“The only way to succeed is to learn from our mistakes and failures and do differently in the future and your exes really can play a positive role with your self-development and partnership skills.”
OK, we are totally on board with Grande-ing!