Social media is a wonderful thing. It’s the reason we have memes and pics of doggos and Jeffree Star. It’a cess pool of humour and glitter and cynicism and really is a beautiful thing.
It’s hard to imagine everyday life without it. Falling Down A Youtube black hole is one of my favourite things to pass the time. I can go from makeup tutorial videos to music videos to clips of people blending random household items all in the space of an hour. It’s mindless and cathartic- like modern day meditation.
Except for the small fact that it does the exact opposite from switching my brain off- it leave me wired and jittery.
There’s more to life than Snapchat filters and Boomerangs. Hard to believe, I know.
If you’re looking to swap your mobile screen for something easier on the eyes, I’m here to help you out. I present you with seven things to do instead of losing yourself to the interwebs.
- Read that book that’s been sitting on your bedside table for a year.
It ain’t gonna read itself.
2. Craft.
Yes, with a glue gun and rhinestones. There’s nothing that doesn’t look better with some bedazzling.
Or, if you’re feeling mushy, make cards for your friends.
3. Take the damn bins out.
Your mum called. She also said you should wash your shower screen- “it’s filthy”.
4. Check in with the mates you haven’t talked to in a while.
Yes, this one technically still involves your phone but it’s for a good cause. Think of the children.
And by children I just mean the adult babies you’ve been neglecting and who have probably wound themselves into a knot thinking you’re mad at them when really you’re just too invested in Jenna Marbles videos to give your real friends the time of day.
5. Buy a puppy.
This is me giving you permission.
6. Start a podcast.
Isn’t that what all the millennials are doing these days?
7. Moisturise
Another thing you’re neglecting. Trust me, your cuticles with thank you for it. While you’re at it you should try flossing (your teeth, not the dance move), booking that doctors appointment and go for a facial too.
BONUS NUMBER 8. Make a mix tape.
Playlists are overrated- do it the old fashioned way. Then you can put it in a boom box and recreate this iconic scene which we’ve all been dreaming about:
Alternatively to all of these things, you could just give up and give in to the black hole. The choice is yours.
(See you on the dark side).