Bleats

This Octopus Attacking A Vlogger Is Darwinism In Motion

Maybe don't go around eating live octopuses if you don't want them attacking you.

Saddle up, folks, because we have a doozy of a tale about a failed dinner, Darwinism in motion, and unexpected viral stardom.

A Chinese vlogger by the name of “seaside girl Little Seven” live-streamed herself trying to eat a still-alive octopus because, well, it’s apparently what people want to watch in China these days.

Rather than be tamely consumed, the octopus fought back and what was initially a case of animal cruelty masquerading as a foodie video quickly descended into a desperate struggle for survival.

Upon realising that it was getting eaten, the octopus latched onto the woman’s face with an iron grip. After 30 seconds of struggling, screaming, and crying, the vlogger managed to finally break free from the octopus’s, leaving her with a bloodied cheek and the complete loss of her dignity.

Words alone can’t do this display of ridiculousness and karmic justice so just watch the whole thing unfold right here.

The vlogger may have ended up with an empty stomach and a bleeding cheek but it definitely worked from an exposure standpoint as her little video quickly went viral and garnered millions of views.

Now you’d think that she would’ve learned a valuable lesson on not eating a live octopus after this little incident but it sounds like she literally took nothing from it as she tells The Independent that her “face is disfigured” but intends to “eat [the octopus] in the next video.”

That’s a bit of an understatement.

Whatever you do, definitely don’t feel any sympathy for this woman whatsoever because what she did was just straight up animal cruelty since eating any creature that’s still breathing is just awful.

If said creature is an octopus, then that’s even worse because those things are some of the smartest invertebrates in the world and can rival dogs in intelligence. Couple that with the fact that octopuses almost certainly feel pain, it’s no wonder why the vlogger was attacked.

So just a piece of advice, seaside girl Little Seven, please don’t go eating another live octopus. If you decide to still go forward with it and it retaliates, then don’t say we didn’t warn you. Plus you definitely deserve it at that point.

Arya's Fancy Moves On The Latest Game Of Thrones Has Inspired A New Viral Internet Challenge

What do we say to the god of the internet? Arya challenge!

SPOILERS AHEAD FOR GAME OF THRONES SEASON 8 EPISODE 3!

YOU’VE BEEN WARNED!

If we’re being honest, the most recent episode of Game Of Thrones, “The Long Night“, didn’t exactly rank up there as one of its finest despite all the hype about it having the grandest battle sequence ever seen on TV and film.

That being said, there were enough moments to offset some of the episode’s big flaws (like how frigging dark everything was), such as Arya Stark’s fighting moves and her epic takedown of the Night King at the end.

Arya’s fancy knife skills certainly caught the eye of many viewers, so much so that it has inspired a new viral internet challenge.

Stick them with the pointy end.

This new challenge basically reenacts Arya’s fancy move that enabled her to kill the Night King: pretend to stab something up high with a knife/fork/carrot/hairbrush/whatever before dropping the weapon into your second hand, which is near your waist, and finishing the attack.

Look, that was very difficult to describe using words so it’s probably better that you watch all the videos of people attempting this fancy little challenge instead.

As far as internet challenges go, this one is pretty cool and is actually, you know, something of a challenge since you actually need some coordination to drop something from one hand to another at the right time. Given how the last 12 months have seen the birth of some truly stupid stunts, like the Tide Pod and Bird Box challenges, the Arya challenge is definitely a step up.

And the best part of this challenge? It actually makes for a decent dance move to add to your repertoire. The god of death is probably frowning at all this right now but hey, you know what we say to that? Not today.

This Dad Forcing His Son To Smash Up His PS4 Due To Poor Grades Is Just Bad Parenting

This is just cooked but at least the dad racked up some decent clicks on YouTube.

When I was a kid and I acted up, my parents disciplined me accordingly. Played with fire? Made to stand in a dark garage for 30 mins to think about what I did. Beat up on my younger brother? No mobile phones for a week. Poor grades? Video game consoles and computer games were suddenly reserved for school holiday time only. Sure this would be shocking to a kid, but there’s no denying it was also some good parental discipline that put me in line without going too far.

Recently there was a lot of attention towards a video in which a dad (who goes by the name of Tre Cosby on YouTube) punishes his son due to their bad grades. But rather than take away his son’s video game consoles or smartphone, the dad decides to force his kid to smash up their PS4 with a bat. When that didn’t quite work, the dad decided to take the matter into his own hands by running over the console with his car.

If you think that’s cooked, you’re far from the only one as the ratio of likes and dislikes, as well as the slew of comments, is definitely not in the Tre’s favour.

This whole “forcing his son to smash his PS4” is incredibly messed up and is about as likely to properly discipline the kid into getting good grades as seeing the Joker riding a purple flying elephant. If I got supremely pissed at my parents for taking away my phone, then imagine what this kid must be feeling after his dad made him demolish his PS4 with a bat.

And somehow that aspect is only the second worst part of this whole viral video because not only did the dad film it all and put it on YouTube for the clicks, he actually did something similar a few years ago when he filmed himself running over his son’s Xbox as punishment for stealing and put the video on YouTube with “Good Parenting” in the title.

Let’s unpack all this, shall we?

Firstly, the fact that he’s wrecked two of his kid’s consoles shows that this disciplinary method works about as well as drinking water through your skin. Secondly, filming all this and putting it on YouTube clearly shows that he’s less interested in being a good parent and more keen on exploiting his kid for views.

And lastly, the dude clearly has money as he’s driving a Ford Mustang and living in a nice house so why not get his kid a tutor for his bad grades instead?

I’m not a parent but you don’t need to be one to know that this just poor parenting in all regards, and ol’ mate Tre Cosby is no different to those who blame Fortnite for their kid’s gaming addiction rather than, you know, themselves.

Of course this could’ve all been just a farce in an attempt to go viral, which is definitely a possibility we can’t rule out considering the guy’s pattern of activity on YouTube and the fact that Tre’s most popular videos happen to be when he ran over his kid’s Xbox and PS4. Hell, the kid could actually be a genius for all we know and this was all his dad’s own doing.

But if that is the case, then he’s no different to any other YouTuber exploiting their kid and/or pet for views and this whole article has been an exercise in pointlessness.

Either way, there’s less controversial – and cheaper – ways of scoring brownie points with the internet than smashing up a kid’s PS4. Try throwing cheese at your kid’s face next time, Tre.

#Trending

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