I’m of Arabic descent so ‘red meat’ is basically my middle name.
I’m also, if I do say so myself, a pretty nice person. And like most nice people, I don’t hate things unnecessarily. Take vegans for example: they’re just out there doing their thing and I’m okay with that. Just because I love a Sunday roast doesn’t mean they can’t enjoy a cauliflower steak.
Plus, my boyfriend goes vegan sometimes so I kinda HAVE to be nice.
But my respect for vegans is a sham. I’ve been living in ignorant bliss for my entire 23 years and now my eyes have been opened to the truth.
Truth = this vegan ‘lasagne’ (read: abomination).
Coworker brought in vegan lasagna today and I’m ready to knock all that shit over. pic.twitter.com/eZWgkQNPWP
— Peaches (@AristaFbabi) April 30, 2019
Thus began my hatred of every non-meat eater in the world.
First of all, that’s not a lasagne. It’s a SALAD. Why are you lying to yourselves vegans? You’re a lot of things but I didn’t take you for a race of liars.
— Dictionary.com (@Dictionarycom) April 30, 2019
Also…why you do this???
Like, how is that appealing to you? I love all foods (hunger does not discriminate) but that^ thing makes me the opposite of hungry.
A salad where they touched every piece.
— BackPage, The Movie (@BPageMovie) April 30, 2019
I can feel the carbs in my body crying. I’m pretty sure if I listen hard enough I can even hear all the Italians sobbing in agony.
Lmaooo this is just a breadless cold cut sandwich in casserole form https://t.co/S0vrCdPHel
— Pooch. (@ItsVee_) April 30, 2019
I feel like it’s my responsibility to remind all the vegans in the world that PACKAGED PASTA IS VEGAN. There’s vegan cheese too AND vegan meat. If you really wanted a lasagne you could have made a lasagne and spared me this kind of pain.
More importantly, you could have enjoyed a filling, tasty meal rather than a glorified salad and whatever that creamy white dressing is.
@Vegans, for the love of all things good and holy learn how to cook proper vegan food. Or just learn how to cook because stacked lettuce leaves are not a meal.