Bleats

Never Forget How Horrible Our Reaction Was To Vanessa Hudgens' 2007 Leaked Nudes

We really sucked in 2007.

In 2006 when High School Musical rocked our worlds, Vanessa Hudgens quickly became the Disney Channel’s poster girl for teen innocence. She was young, beautiful, and presented as conservative to the point where her and Zac Efron’s characters Gabriella and Troy didn’t even kiss in the first HSM film.

So in 2007 when private, nude photos of Hudgens were leaked online, both the media and public reacted with disappointment that she wasn’t the squeaky clean, two-dimensional fantasy that we saw on Disney.

The coverage and conversations around Vanessa Hudgens leaked photos were not about the fact that a man had maliciously and illegally violated her privacy, but about criticising the teen star for taking the photos in the first place.

18-year-old Vanessa Hudgens even apologised for the scandal at the time, which shows the level of shame everyone was comfortable with a young woman feeling simply for privately enjoying her own body and sexuality.

“I want to apologize to my fans, whose support and trust means the world to me,” she said at the time. “I am embarrassed over this situation and regret having ever taken these photos.”

The rhetoric reeked of slut shaming, and the idea that Hudgens had ‘let down’ Disney came from both outside and inside the company. That much is clear from a statement made by Joe Jonas in a 2016 interview, where he recalls working with Disney during the first Vanessa Hudgen’s nude photo scandal.

“We’d hear execs talking about it, and they would tell us that they were so proud of us for not making the same mistakes.” He told E!

In a statement to People back in 2007, a Disney spokesperson said about Vanessa’s photos:

“Vanessa has apologized for what was obviously a lapse in judgment. We hope she’s learned a valuable lesson.”

The victim blaming of Vanessa Hudgens was atrocious, and she honestly deserves an apology from Disney, and every media outlet and person who slut shamed her.

Over the years, Hudgens has been the target of revenge porn at least four times, usually maliciously timed to coincide with the release of her new projects. Her privacy was so frequently violated that it became a cruel joke that her nudes were ‘old news’, leaked by Vanessa herself, or that she should know better by now.

Vanessa was one of the celebrity victims of the large-scale 2014 illegal hacking and release of nude photos known as ‘The Fappening’, though thankfully by then the rhetoric around these incidents had changed dramatically to lay judgement on the hacker.

While slut-shaming is far from being erased entirely, the increased awareness of the problem with victim blaming means that those victims at least have some support. We would not expect them to apologise the way that Vanessa Hudgens was made to in order to continue her career. There has also been progress in the legal system cracking down on punishment for the criminals who share revenge porn and private photos.

Even though we have a long way still to go, we can be thankful that we have progressed past the point where the general consensus is slut-shaming victims of revenge porn. But it helps to remember the people we condemned within our lifetime, who we can now see with the benefit of hindsight, absolutely deserve our apology.  

If Justin Bieber’s Pregnancy Announcement Is A Joke, It’s Astoundingly Elaborate

Surely not.

Justin Bieber, ever the jokester, posted a picture of a sonogram to his Instagram. The sonogram isn’t Hailey’s, which can be deduced from the fact that the baby in the picture is fully formed and Hailey is not visibly pregnant, the date on the sonogram is February 2 from an unspecified year, and Biebs posted it on April Fool’s Day.

While some fell for the sonogram, a lot of people called it out as fake news.

But about 15 minutes later, JB followed up with another post, captioned,

“If U thought it was April fools,”

So if this is an April Fool’s prank, it is extremely elaborate. Did Justin and Hailey Bieber do a whole photoshoot with a medical professionals and the suggestive touching of her stomach area just for April Fool’s??? That seems bizarre.

If it is a prank I don’t know if I’m impressed of weirded out by the whole thing, but there are plenty of fellow celebrities commenting with their congratulations on Justin’s most recent post.

He also did mention fatherhood recently in a post about his mental health, so this could be the real deal, and just a very confusing way to share the news.

Honestly I don’t know what to believe any more.

UPDATE:

Right, so he posted this.

So there you go, a really really thorough and drawn out April Fool’s Day prank. A

Not To Be Bitter But Chris Pratt And Katherine Schwarzenegger’s Astro Compatibility sucks

Admittedly, I'm feeling a little bitter.

Sometimes it really seems like the only person who is handling the end of Chris Pratt and Anna Faris’s marriage is Anna Faris. There were many life lessons to be learnt from her reaction to Pratt’s engagement to Katherine Schwarzenegger back in January, and she continues to be an icon.

Meanwhile Chris Pratt’s stock plummeted with both our irrational bitterness to his moving on, and our rational disappointment with his response to worshiping at a notoriously anti-LGBTQ church. Hence the revised ranking of the Hollywood Chrises, for a post-Pratt 2019.

But this discussion of Chris Pratt’s underwhelming astrological compatibility with new fiancé Katherine Schwarzenegger is coming from a completely unbiased place and not at all coloured by the personal feelings of bitterness harboured for these celebrity strangers.

So Chris Pratt is a Cancer, born June 21, and Schwarzenegger is a Sagittarius, born December 13. It’s a rare combination to be drawn to each other, and yet, here we are. Let’s unpack that.

#1. What Do They Want?

According to the stars, each sign has a different concept of an ‘ideal relationship’ and that can cause clashing down the line.

#2. Trust Issues Ahoy?

Look, Cancers tend to like security, and Sag’s are known for their love of freedom. So that might mean they can be trying to make it work but speaking different love languages. One might feel suspicious and the other might feel stifled. Astrologically speaking, it’s set to be a challenge.

#3. Will They Have The Patience?

To make things work it will mean overcoming the obstacles and finding a unique dynamic that can last long term. These zodiacs press each other’s buttons and boundaries. They’ll need some strong communication skills to persevere.

Me, talking shit.

So there you have it, the stars are here to feed our irrational bitterness towards Chris Pratt and Katherine Schwarzenegger.

Of course there is a chance that this Cancer-Sag match will have a great relationship in spite of the astrological obstacles and of course we wish them health and happiness blah blah blah.

We’re all just coping in our own, salty, transcendent ways.

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