Bleats

Our New Lord And Saviour Baby Yoda Is Leading The US Presidential Race

Vote for him, I would.

The main reason I’ve been on the internet at all over the last couple of weeks is Baby Yoda. If we were beginning to think we’d seen the end of him though, this morning he crashed back on to our screens by drinking soup and being revealed as the frontrunner in the US 2020 election campaign.

I’m behind on my work now because I’ve spent half an hour looking at Baby Yoda gifs

A major way of tracking how a politician – or any public figure, really – is doing with the public is by seeing how many social media hits they get, and the sort of feedback left in the comments sections. The more clicks and comments you have, the better you’re generally doing.

(Unless you’ve majorly bombed out on a post, but that’s a whole other story.)

Look! At! Him!

Between the 12th and 25th of November, some people at Axios kept track of how many interactions all the posts about different Democratic candidates got, and compared them to Baby Yoda. Bernie Sanders averaged 850 interactions on every post, 839 for Joe Biden, and Pete Buttigieg came in third with an average of 600 interactions per post.

Baby Yoda averaged 1,671.

Baby Yoda made his adorable debut to the world in the same week that former New York City mayor Michael Bloomberg, and former Massachusetts governor Deval Patrick announced that they were going to join the race to the White House. Pretty massive news in the world of politics, and yet Baby Yoda still got ten times the attention they did.

As if Baby Yoda wouldn’t get all the attention tbh

I would even go so far as to bet that the comments on Baby Yoda posts are overwhelmingly positive (let’s be real, it’s mostly just me crying over him on my keyboard), whereas you basically need a hazmat suit if you’ve ever wanted to delve into the comments section of a politicians social media.

Baby Yoda hasn’t officially announced his run for the Presidency yet, but he absolutely has the support to get there. And if a billionaire without any political experience can make it to the White House, then so can a tiny, green 50 year old, and nobody can tell me otherwise.

The First Baby Yoda Merch Is Out, And Frankly We Deserve Better

Terrible, this is.

Star Wars has crashed back onto our screens in a major way over the last few years, and the newest TV series, The Mandalorian, is just as popular as you’d expect. You don’t have to have watched the series though to know all about the main breakout star of the show: Baby Yoda. 

Forget cats and baby alpacas, Baby Yoda is the internet’s current obsession, and for damn good reason. Just look at it.

I can’t.

(I promise I put a gif there. If it disappears, just assume that Disney has actually succeeded on their mission to wipe the internet of Baby Yoda gifs).

With Christmas approaching faster than anybody would like to acknowledge right now, it seems like the perfect time to bring out some amazing merch. Let’s be real, we’d buy pretty much anything with its little face on it.

It looks like the merchandisers knew that too, because the first official merch is… yeah look it’s a bit crap.

I’m willing to accept that Disney wasn’t actually prepared for the astronomical popularity of Baby Yoda. Maybe they hadn’t realised quite how desperate we all are for something good to cling to amongst all the bad news on the internet, or maybe they just thought we would all say “oh that’s cute” and move on.

WE WILL NEVER MOVE ON

Disney say that they didn’t come up with merch because they didn’t want to ruin the surprise of Baby Yoda’s existence, but surely they’d at least have some ideas ready to go? My guess is that everyone panicked and some poor merchandising intern was given the task of coming up with something to sell quick-smart, and this is what happened. 

In much better news, there’s more merch coming our way soon. We’ve been told there will be more shirts and plush toys, so we can give Baby Yoda the cuddle we’ve all been desperate to give it. 

Patience, we must have.

Robert De Niro Reckons Trump Could Be President Til 2028, So That’s Great

Wouldn't be the first rule Donald has broken.

There are a lot of rules that American presidents have to follow, most of them Donald Trump seems to have broken. According to Robert De Niro, if Trump manages to make it in for another term after the 2020 election, he might go to some pretty drastic measures to stay in for a third term. 

US presidential terms go for 4 years, so that could mean we’re stuck with President Trump until 2028.

The Americans are all about their amendments, and the 22nd one is in place to make sure that nobody can stay in for longer than two terms. It reads:

No person shall be elected to the office of the President more than twice, and no person who has held the office of President, or acted as President, for more than two years of a term to which some other person was elected President shall be elected to the office of President more than once. 

Great, makes sense. So how does Robert De Niro reckon Trump will get around the constitution? By starting a war.

In an interview, De Niro said:

“I’m worried because if he gets re-elected, it’s gonna be very, very bad—very bad on a lot of levels. We already have a lot of reparations, if you will—repairs—to do to the damage that he’s already done, and he has to be gotten out. 

He’s going to be history at one point, though he’d love to be president for life. He jokes about it. I think that if he became president for a second term he’d try to have a third term, and let smarter people manipulate it into getting us into some kind of altercation: a war.”

This is, of course, assuming that Trump manages to avoid impeachment and win a second term in 2020. But if he clears those hurdles, then who knows? As De Niro said, he’s joked about being president forever before, and starting a whole war out of selfish reasons doesn’t seem so far fetched for Donald Trump.

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