Bleats

This Basic Math Equation Will Deadset Start WWIII In Your Group Chat

Quick maths.

I’m a writer so hating maths is part of by DNA. I didn’t love it in primary school, I didn’t love it in high school, and it still gives me the sweats as an adult. 

Most of my maths knowledge evaporated into thin air the second I put the pencil down in my final high school exam, but there’s some random tethers of mathematical knowledge hanging onto my brains cells. 

For example, BODMAS: Brackets Of Addition Multiplication Addition and Subtraction

In English: the order in which you need to complete things when presented with a basic math equation like this:

I was pretty chuffed with myself when I realised I remembered how to do this^. The answer is 16 – simple. 

Here’s my working out (shoutout to my maths teacher): 

But my elation didn’t last long because some people online reckon this ‘basic’ math equation actually has another answer: 1.

My face. Source: Giphy

Twitter has erupted with arguments on both sides of the equation, if you will. 

I am convinced that 16 is the one and only correct answer. So convinced, in fact, that I argued with my colleagues for five minutes about how wrong they are (yes, they think the answer is 1) and proceeded to explain BODMAS to them (see above) with the most passion I’ve ever displayed about maths. 

I’m right. But I’m also wrong. Because, the answer people get when completing the equation comes down to what they were taught in school.

Yep, the maths for both answers checks out.

This is just proof that there is actually no logic to maths and we should all give up now and become novelists. 

People Are Sharing Their Dumbest Ideas To Improve The World And They Might Be Onto Something

Stupidly smart.

The world is a bit of an effed up place. Every time I watch the news I walk away feeling like I need a glitter cocktail because everything is just so doom and gloom.

People on Twitter are sharing their dumbest ideas to save the world and I think they might be onto something. 

When I say onto something, I really mean they’re speaking to my frustrated, petty soul. 

While these ideas are great they are definitely dumb. And privileged. 

Implementing fines against slow walkers or a universal nap time is not going to make the world a better place. They’ll definitely improve our personal lives, but we’re just a microscopic part of the population. There are a lot more people around the globe with far bigger issues that need fixing first. You know, like world peace and poverty. 

The answer to all our problems. Source: Giphy

Of course, it’s impossible to wake up one day and just rid the world of war and give riches to the poor. If it were that easy it would have happened long ago. That doesn’t mean we can’t still work towards achieving those things. 

Sometimes, the smallest gestures speak the loudest: feeding the homeless, for example, won’t rid the world of all homelessness but it will brighten the day of some people. Which is better than nothing. 

It’s also better than sitting in a leather armchair in our parents house tweeting about how our privileged lives can be improved. 

Plus, who’s to say we can’t have self-cleaning butts and world peace? 

Genius. Source: Giphy

If You're Struggling To Cut Old Friends Loose, Get Inspo From These RL Mate Breakups

Friendship shouldn't be a chore.

Because I’m feeling generous, I’ve got some valuable life advice for you: stop being friends with people because you feel obligated. 

I don’t want to hear your “but”s and I don’t care how much history you have. It’s simple: friendship shouldn’t be a chore. If you find yourself dreading someone’s company, if a person is making you question humanity, if your ‘best mate’ treats you like crap, then you need to cut them out of your life. 

I’m not telling you to drop a friend because it’s too hard to organise time to see each other- that’s silly. Friendship isn’t all sunshine and smooth sailing, it requires a bit of effort. If you’re the only one making the effort, that’s when you drop ‘em. 

It’s a cliché but it’s true: life is too short. Worrying about someone who clearly doesn’t worry about you is a lost cause. 

I’ve had my fair share of lost friendships. Sometimes I still cry- just because I don’t want certain people or negative energies in my life doesn’t mean it still doesn’t suck sometimes. Especially in situations where you’ve lost a friend because they decided to play you for a fool, lie to your face, tell everyone you’re the bad guy and eventually make you choose between your own happiness and their loyalty (true story). 

Basically. Source: Giphy

You win some, you lose some and that’s okay. 

If you don’t believe me maybe these real life stories will help give you the inspiration you need to cut that old friend loose. Or at least make you laugh the anger right out of you. 

You’re welcome in advance. 

“I was friends with two guys all throughout high school (who were also best friends) and ended up dating one of them for over a year. When I realised I didn’t really like being with him, we broke up and it was totally fine until I fell for the other guy and we got together. My ex found out at school camp and they physically fought, fell out and stopped being friends for 4 years and never spoke to each other again.”

“I haven’t spoken to one of my best friends in 2 years because she was showing sociopathic tenancies and said that she gets ‘murderous urges’.”

So not cool. Source: Giphy

“I actually had a friend do this to me at the start of the year…  but it was due to her jealously of my life and her insecurities that she wasn’t good enough to be friends with me. Weird!”

Relatable. This next one, not so much: 

“My old housemate stabbed someone, we’re not friends anymore.”

lol k. Source: Giphy

“Another one is a friend who was always rude to wait staff, like RAHUDE. To the point where I would tip and apologise. If I ever see her, it’s not revolved around food.”

Yep, it takes a special breed of human to be rude to waitstaff. 

“I dumped a friend because I ended up getting a job before her and all she could say was “that’s motivated me to start looking for jobs”. I was really hurt because that (in addition to a lot of other comments she made) made me feel like she thought I didn’t deserve to get the job.”

“A Girl I went to high school with was a compulsive liar. These are just some of the lies she told us: 

  • Warner Bros bought her story to be made into a movie for $1 million dollars. She even made up fake emails and used to print them out and show us. She also said that if she carried her script around Warner Bros would pay her more. So she literally used to come to school with a backpacker bag
  • She got up on stage with Eminem and sang a duet. 
  • She’d go for runs at night with Jesse McCartney.
  • She went to dinner with Johnny Depp.” 
Lies are what, Jack? Source: Giphy

“My friends and I thought it’d be a good idea to bring a bottle of vodka on year 10 camp. The teachers found out, because my ex told them out of spite because we wouldn’t share. These two girls and I were put on a coach at 3am and sent back to Sydney. My friends’ mums both pulled the girls out of school and sent them to separate high schools. I didn’t see either of them until last year when I went back home to the local christmas carols.”

Love getting drunk at 15 (mum if you’re reading this, I’m joking). 

And finally, this doozy: 

“I dropped a mate after her wedding. Right before the wedding, my ex-friends brother attended the bucks in Thailand and discovered that the groom to be was up to no good and carrying on with other women. Needless to say, when the bride to be found out, it really hit the fan. When she was deciding whether or not to leave him and cancel the wedding, I asked her why she loves him and her response was “he buys me things, treats me well and takes me to nice dinners”.  She forgave him and married him and I decided I need a friend with more depth.”

Listen to Michelle. Source: Giphy

#Trending

Show More Show Less

Follow Us