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The Transcript Of Trump's Cooked Ukraine Chat Reads Like A Mafia Film

An offer of covfefe he can't refuse.

Donald Trump isn’t having the best time of it on this season of “The Trump Admin Shenanigans,” is he? After the House Speaker Nancy Pelosi formally announced an impeachment probe into the US Cheeto-in-Chief following his seedy Ukraine dealings which included a seriously troubling phone call back in July, the transcript of said phone call has been released and hoo boy is it something.

Just to quickly bring everyone up to speed, Trump had a chat with Ukraine’s president back in July and reportedly asked them to make up dig up dirt on his 2020 election challenger Joe Biden’s son. This alarmed some folks, one of whom blew the whistle and Congress reacted by forcing the White House to release the transcript of Trump’s chat with Ukraine.

Well folks, we have (some of) the transcript and it honestly reads like a C-grade mafia film that Trump himself wrote with gold sharpie.

Not only does the Ukrainian president speaks like a Trump clone – he says “drain the swamp” and kisses arse like what Trump does in the company of dictators like Kim Jong-un – but Trump even had the gall to say this:

“I would like you to do us a favor though because our country has been through a lot and Ukraine knows a lot about it.”

It’s definitely got this vibe going.

But the highlight of the entire thing is when Trump drops this little nugget about Biden:

“There’s a lot of talk about Biden’s son, that Biden stopped the prosecution and a lot of people want to find out about that so whatever you can do with the Attorney General would be great. Biden went around bragging that he stopped the prosecution so if you can look into it. It sounds horrible to me.”

Trump’s mafia film The transcript is only five pages but the “dodgy stuff per page” ratio is off the scale on this thing and you can check it out here.

Now there are a few things to keep in mind about this transcript released by the White House. Firstly, it isn’t the complete transcript and is only part of the entire conversation Trump had with Ukraine’s president.

And secondly, the transcript technically isn’t even a transcript as it is a memorandum of the phone call and therefore may not even be 100 percent verbatim.

It’s almost like the White House has some skeletons to hide or something.

It remains to be seen how this dodgy transcript of Trump’s even dodgier phone call with Ukraine will affect the whole impeachment thing that’s going on but you can be sure the Trump Admin have got a plan to discredit everything related to it… which would’ve went okay (for them) had they decided to not accidentally send it to the Democrats.

Throw in the extra spicy detail that Ukraine definitely knew ahead of time that discussing Joe Biden was a condition for a chat with Trump and what you have is… well, it’s something bad for the orange-haired Combover Caligula

The impeachment season of “The Trump Admin Shenanigans” probe just got way more interesting.

Here’s Why Donald Trump Is Facing An Impeachment Probe

It's about time.

Folks, it’s happening. After years of Democrats and countless millions of Americans crying out for an impeachment probe into Donald Trump, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi has finally pulled the trigger and launched an official impeachment inquiry into Combover Caligula.

Following a meeting with House Democrats, Pelosi formally announced the proceedings with short but pointed statement declaring that Trump’s attempts at strong-arming Ukraine into taking “actions which would benefit him politically” is a “betrayal of his oath of and betrayal of [America’s] national security and betrayal of the integrity of [America’s] elections” before stating that “no one is above the law.”

It’s about time, Nancy, and there’s no better time to dust off this little gem:

Okay, now that we’re finally into impeachment waters, what exactly will House Democrats ping Trump on with this probe?

After all, there’s a laundry list of things to nail the US Cheeto-in-Chief with ever since he moved into the White House, like the countless obstruction of justice charges, everything that went down in the Mueller Report, the Russia stuff, the egregious Emoluments Clause violations and the several felonies. Well not quite.

Based on reports and the messaging put out by House Democrats and Nancy Pelosi, the primary focus of this impeachment probe will be on the Trump/Ukraine/Biden saga.

This new season of Trump Administration Shenanigans kicked off when a whistleblower filed a formal complaint about some worrying communications between Trump and a foreign leader – later revealed to be Ukraine’s president Volodymyr Zelenskiy – which included a July 25 phone call.

Reports later revealed that Trump pressured Zelenskiy into making up digging up dirt on on Hunter Biden, son of his primary 2020 election challenger Joe Biden. Trump reportedly asked Zelenskiy eight times to investigate Hunter, who has business interests in Ukraine, or he would’ve made sure the country wouldn’t get the nearly $400 million in military aid Congress had approved.

So why is this bad enough to warrant impeachment? Well it’s illegal for a political campaign to accept gifts or something of “value” from a foreign government and Trump trying to coerce Ukraine into digging up dirt on Hunter Biden easily fits that bill.

Unsurprisingly, Trump denied everything before blurting it all out while at the UNGA and declared that he’ll approve the release of the transcript of the call he had with Zelenskiy to prove his “innocence.”

As for his response to this official impeachment probe from Nancy Pelosi and House Democrats, well he went on Twitter and did his usual mindless ranting thing:

Over the next year or so, we can expect official hearing after hearing as part of this impeachment probe into Trump, which definitely won’t make him happy.

So what about all the other illegal things Trump has done that warrants an impeachment investigation? Well it’s early days yet and it is possible that Democrats could introduce additional articles of impeachment later down the track.

But that’s getting too ahead of ourselves. The bottom line is Nancy Pelosi has finally announced a formal impeachment inquiry into Trump for his dealings with Ukraine and things are about to heat up really quickly. Best prepare the popcorn because this is going to be good.

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