Bleats

The Full Toy Story 4 Trailer Proves This Movie Is Not Really Made For The Kids

This is for us.

Everything about the first (and likely final) full length Toy Story 4 trailer points to the fact that this epic production is made first and foremost for the big kids who grew up with the franchise.

While a lot of Disney/Pixar productions tend to appeal to both children and adults, the primary target audience for most is the kiddies. But Toy Story has retained the same target audience over the years, and though we were kiddies when the first Toy Story was originally released in 1995, we’re young adults now and Toy Story 4 is decidedly for us.

The trailer gives us a close look at the existential identity crisis of ‘forky’, caught between being a toy and a piece of cutlery just as we are caught between childhood and adulthood. Little Bo Peep makes her return after 20 years as Bo, who appears to be the feminist hero of this entire film.

There’s a villainous group of creepy-as-hell ventriloquist dolls that are too scary to have had a child audience in mind. There’s action, emotion, an epic music moment with ‘God Only Knows’ by The Beach Boys likely bringing on your tears in the trailer.

And of course, there’s Woody, Buzz, and the crew on a journey to decide where they belong, and what they should or could do with their lives.

This movie is clearly targeting us by having characters old and new mirror the anxieties of young adulthood. So prepare for a therapeutic cry to Toy Story 4 when the film hits cinemas in Australia on June 20.

Will Smith As Genie Actually Looks Better Than Just Blue Shrek In New Aladdin Trailer, Thankfully

We're sold.

When the first teaser for Disney’s Aladdin live-action remake came out a little while ago, our main concern was the big hunk of blue that is Will Smith as Genie. It didn’t feel quite right, and not just because no one can replace Robin Williams in his iconic role.

But now we finally have the first full length trailer for Aladdin, and everything looks a lot better than expected – including Will Smith as Genie. The crucial point is likely that he is not a big blue legless being the whole time, instead wearing his own skin some times to blend in.

The consensus is that this is better, much better.

We also catch a bit of his rendition of ‘Friend Like Me’ and it sounds pretty damn good. Combine with the first tease of ‘Whole New World’, the magic carpet and the fact that this looks like an ideal action-packed romcom, and we have ourselves an excellent trailer for what is looking like an excellent movie.

A good trailer is a powerful thing.

The Aladdin live-action remake is set to be released in the US on May 24.

Gabriella Should Have Ditched Troy And Dated Zeke In High School Musical But She Was Playing

Why isn't everyone trying to date Zeke?

The 2006 classic Disney Channel Original, High School Musical, can seem very different when you re-watch it. The wisdom of reflection and old age filters the movie through fresh eyes, and the narrative warps to reveal new perspectives.

For example, there is the widely-discussed argument that Sharpay is not in fact the antagonist of Troy and Gabriella’s story, but the victim of a high school popularity contest that flippantly dismisses her hard work and talent.

But I would like to propose a new theory that became abundantly clear upon a recent re-watch of HSM: We were sleepin’ on Zeke.

The real MVP right here.

High School Musical ignited a Zac Efron-loving fire inside of thirsty teens everywhere, including myself. But in retrospect, Troy Bolton is a supremely inferior choice to his team mate Zeke Baylor (played by Chris Warren Jr.)

Just like us, Gabriella did not know what was good for her, and was in fact chasing the wrong d**k. Even Sharpay, who was being actively pursued by Zeke, did not know a good thing when she saw it.

Let’s look at the facts.

#1. Zeke can bake!!!!!

When the call-back sheet goes up and Troy’s theatrical involvement is revealed, Zeke doesn’t see it as an opportunity for outrage or mockery like his peers. He sees it as an opportunity to open the conversation and kick start a movement of fighting against the stereotypes.

Zeke initiates the musical number ‘Stick to the Status Quo’. Zeke is a visionary.

While Chad (Corbin Bleu) is busy enforcing isolating rules of the toxic masculinity and stereotyping, and Troy is still struggling with the idea of challenging that stereotype, Zeke is out here perfecting his damn crème brûlée. 

Zeke sees your digressive perception of masculinity and raises you the passionate pursuit of a traditionally feminine hobby.

#2. Zeke is a better athlete

OK, technically there’s nothing that explicitly says that Zeke is a better player than Troy, however, we can deduce the validity of the claim. Troy’s position as team captain and ‘star player’ seems awfully suspicious considering his own DAD is the COACH. A textbook case of nepotism.

Zeke is taller and stronger and presumably could smash puny little Troy on the court if he wasn’t the coaches ‘golden boy’. Justice for Zeke.

#3. Zeke knows how to treat women

Across the entire High School Musical franchise, we see Zeke demonstrate a romantic and respectful way to court women in his pursuit of Sharpay Evans.

Zeke is open about his feelings, he’s kind, he expresses genuine admiration for her talent, and he bakes her cookies!!! Why isn’t everyone trying to date Zeke???

In conclusion, Troy Bolton does not hold a candle to the adonis that is Zeke Baylor. Troy lives in a world that revolves around himself while Zeke brings not only love and support to the table, but also freshly baked goods. The choice is simple.

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