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Dwayne Johnson Is Making Dick Towels A Thing

Between a Rock and a hard place.

There’s no polite way to ask this so let’s just get down to it: are men wearing towels over their dicks in gyms?

More specifically, are men actually wearing towels tucked into their waistband and covering their junk like a flannelly loincloth?

The answer is that Dwayne “Rock, The” Johnson is doing so and therefore we can only conclude that it is a habit of the world’s gymsiest men and that all masculinity will therefore follow.

Yeah, but what about the dick towel?

This revelation was courtesy of Jezabel‘s Tracy Clark-Flory, who had noticed a theme in Dwayne’s gym themed Instagram posts. And people say investigative journalism is in crisis!

Her deep dive into the matter explored two potential reasons for this fashion trend: one, that dudes were just carrying their towel in the one place they could easily access it to wipe their hands; and two, that the tucked in section provided much needed extra support for a dude’s groinal region while wearing compression tights.

Again, about the towel…

The other possibility, obviously, is that dudes are calling attention to their business via a tantalising peek-a-boo junk-tent. Or maybe that they wish to conceal the fact that compression tights make their wangs look like twisted birds trapped in driftnets.

In any case: gents, if you’re not giving your gym crotch a little front-cape then clearly you are doing it wrong. The Rock’s groin has spoken.