Bleats

The First Baby Yoda Merch Is Out, And Frankly We Deserve Better

Terrible, this is.

Star Wars has crashed back onto our screens in a major way over the last few years, and the newest TV series, The Mandalorian, is just as popular as you’d expect. You don’t have to have watched the series though to know all about the main breakout star of the show: Baby Yoda. 

Forget cats and baby alpacas, Baby Yoda is the internet’s current obsession, and for damn good reason. Just look at it.

I can’t.

(I promise I put a gif there. If it disappears, just assume that Disney has actually succeeded on their mission to wipe the internet of Baby Yoda gifs).

With Christmas approaching faster than anybody would like to acknowledge right now, it seems like the perfect time to bring out some amazing merch. Let’s be real, we’d buy pretty much anything with its little face on it.

It looks like the merchandisers knew that too, because the first official merch is… yeah look it’s a bit crap.

I’m willing to accept that Disney wasn’t actually prepared for the astronomical popularity of Baby Yoda. Maybe they hadn’t realised quite how desperate we all are for something good to cling to amongst all the bad news on the internet, or maybe they just thought we would all say “oh that’s cute” and move on.

WE WILL NEVER MOVE ON

Disney say that they didn’t come up with merch because they didn’t want to ruin the surprise of Baby Yoda’s existence, but surely they’d at least have some ideas ready to go? My guess is that everyone panicked and some poor merchandising intern was given the task of coming up with something to sell quick-smart, and this is what happened. 

In much better news, there’s more merch coming our way soon. We’ve been told there will be more shirts and plush toys, so we can give Baby Yoda the cuddle we’ve all been desperate to give it. 

Patience, we must have.

All The Iconic Moments You Forgot Happened In The Past Decade

It's been a hell of a decade.

As the decade draws to a close, it’s time to start reminiscing on all the wild pop culture moments we’ve lived through. And so, without further ado, a list of all the stuff my brain had decided to block from my memory.

2010
We entered the decade playing Angry Birds and watching Glee. And if you attended literally any sports match, you were playing God. Damn. Vuvuzelas. I had totally forgotten those stupid horns existed, until I read the word and was instantly annoyed at them all over again. They were played so loudly during the 2010 FIFA World Cup that tv stations were putting noise filter on their broadcasts. The worst.

Worst. Instrument. Ever.

2011
Ah, 2011, the year of planking – a trend that my mind had apparently been wiped of. Sadly, now that I think about it, I think there are actually a couple of pictures out there of me planking. It was also the year that Kim Kardashian got married for 72 days, but I’m pretty sure none of us have forgotten about that.

2012
This was a wild year to Google, because pop culture was mostly made up of Gangnam Style and #YOLO, but remember how convinced we all were that we would save the world if we stopped Joseph Kony? #Kony2012 was huge, and people like Bill Gates, Nicki Minaj, and Rihanna got behind the movement. We were less convinced it would save the world after the founder of the movement had a very public, very naked breakdown.

What ever happened to this kid?

2013
Justin Beiber’s Monkeygate was the saga that never seemed to end in 2013. German customs took his pet monkey, Mally, after Beiber tried to bring him into the country for a concert. PETA got involved, there was $11, 000 worth of fines, it was a mess. He also pissed in a restaurant mop bucket while yelling “F**k Bill Clinton!” and announced his retirement twice. 

2014
This was the year that the ALS ice bucket challenge absolutely took over. 2.5 million people took part – including Mark Zuckerberg, Anna Wintour, and Robert Downey Jr. It was the first real example of something criticised for slacktivism, and seemed to be more about the spectacle than the charity, but at the end of the day it worked. The challenge raised over $100 million for ALS charities.

2015
The 2015 VMA’s were a mess, and I remember absolutely living for it at the time. Kanye West made a wild speech announcing that he was running for president in 2020, which has been pushed back to 2024 now, apparently. It was also the year Nicki Minaj absolutely skewered Miley Cyrus. “Back to this bitch that had a lot to say about me the other day in the press; Miley, what’s good?” 

Make that 2024

2016
Look, 2016 was garbage, and we should really throw the whole year away. A lot of things died in 2016 – basically every major celebrity, Harambe, and our hopes that Donald Trump wouldn’t actually be president. Amongst it all I’d managed to forget the spectacular break up of Rob Kardashian and Blac Chyna. Chyna left with their daughter, and Rob came home to an empty house, then put a video of the empty house online. I don’t exactly keep up, per se, but that one was brutal. 

2017
I’m going to stay in Kardashian land here, but oh man. Right in the middle of #BlackLivesMatter protests gripping the globe, Kendall Jenner took part in a Pepsi ad that pretty much implied a Pepsi would fix it all. Yikes.

Spoiler: This doesn’t work

2018
I know it was only last year, but I’m going with all the Roseanne drama for 2018. The reboot had exactly two months of run time before getting canned after Roseanne herself made a racist tweet about a former Obama administration official. Not her best move.

2019
I’m going to take you back to January here. All hail Andy King, the man who was willing to do anything to get water to Fyre Festival. A shining pop culture light in a documentary full of incredibly sketchy people (mostly Billy McFarland).

Oof

What a time to be alive. See you all in 2020!

Who Thought Turning Concentration Camp Uniforms Into High Fashion Was A Good Idea?

How does this keep happening?

There are fashion disasters like nip slips and clashing colours, and then there are straight up fashion disasters that 100% should never have ever happened. Well and truly falling into the second category is a $2,835 outfit that looks almost exactly like a concentration camp uniform from the holocaust.

Spanish fashion house, Loewe put out the striped outfit as part of their William De Morgan capsule collection. The collection was meant to be inspired by the English pottery artist and novelist, who lived in the 1800s, but that inspiration isn’t what most people saw. 

This is the sort of thing we were meant to think of when we saw the clothes

Vertical stripes as a pattern obviously aren’t out of bounds for fashion designers, but as Diet Prada – an Insta account that acts as a fashion watchdog – pointed out:

“With the particular stripe proportions and layout, uniform-style garments, and prominent chest patches, there’s not actually much left to the imagination when the resulting look is so uncannily disturbing.”

Loewe has apologised on Insta, saying:

“It was brought to our attention that one of our looks featured in a magazine as part of our Arts and Crafts ceramicist William De Morgan could be misconstrued as referring to one of the most odious moments in the history of mankind.” 

“It was absolutely never our intention and we apologize to anyone who might feel we were insensitive to sacred memories. The products featured have been removed from our commercial offering.”

It’s not even as if Loewe didn’t have other examples to learn from. Over the last few years, we’ve seen a few brands accidentally turn the holocaust into fashion.

Urban Outfitters had a grey striped t-shirt with a pink triangle over the breast pulled for looking like the uniform that gay inmates were forced to wear. 

Zara had a similar shirt pulled that was meant to look like a cowboy sheriff’s badge, but really just looked like the Star Of David stitched to Jewish people’s clothes when they were in concentration camps. 

A lesson for all fashion designers – maybe put two seconds of thought into what your clothes might resemble before putting them out into the world. Also, the holocaust isn’t fashion.

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