When you think of the Queen, what comes to mind? Personally, I think of lots of sturdy wool peacoats, fine china tea cups and pristine gardens. Sadly, that couldn’t be further from the truth with reports that someone has been using the Queen’s holiday home as an outdoor toilet.
Speaking of the Queen, hear about her daughter’s savagery towards Donald Trump below:
According to multiple reports, employees at Balmoral Castle – a large estate house the Queen frequently visits on holiday – have been complaining about ‘used’ wet wipes being left outside.
In a recent tweet, Balmoral staff wrote, “disappointed to see so many wipes discarded on the Estate today. Next to paths and monuments. Please remember there are no public toilets open for miles around at the moment.”
The staff at Balmoral are right. Due to COVID-19 lockdowns most public toilets around the UK are closed at the moment – leading passersby to drop their dacks near the Queen’s place.
“Part of the problem is that we are seeing a lot of non biodegradable wipes being discarded in the countryside,” the staff added. “Also, people are choosing to relieve themselves right next to busy paths or monuments rather than move a little bit further away to avoid contamination.”
Whoever is doing their business by the Queen’s quarters is ballsy to say the least – but it also doesn’t sound like there’s any other option if you’re desperate.
“If you need to pee, please do so at least 30 metres from lochs or streams,” staff at Balmoral advised. “If you need to defecate, do so as far away as possible from buildings, paths, water courses and farm animals. Bury faeces in a shallow hole and replace the turf.”
Well, that’s nice of them!
No official word from the Queen re: people pooping on her property, but we’re guessing her reaction would go a little something like this:
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