Bleats

R.I.P. To The Holden Commodore, Every Australians First Car

Goodnight, sweet prince.

It’s official. Holden are set to stop producing the Commodore after 41 years of being an Australian legend. 

Up there with the major legends

When I was in high school, I worked at the local auto store. When people were asking about car parts, they usually weren’t expecting to ask a sixteen year old girl with a big red bow in her hair, but that’s what they got.

Anyway, once a Canadian guy came in and handed us a set of seat covers made for Commodores. He asked us what a Commodore was, and we spent about 20 minutes of this poor guys life telling him all about the cultural icon that is the Commy. 

It’s hard to put into words, really. The Commodore was so the first car for so many people that I don’t even want to guess at a number. If it wasn’t your first car, it was your mates first car, and haphazardly throwing an unrolled tent (but usually no tent pegs) and beer in the back of one and driving off for a weekend is a near-universal Australian experience.

Hell yeah, we are

The poor Canadian guy absolutely didn’t understand, but I promise we tried.

The Holden Commodore first hit our shores in 1978, and became Australia’s best selling car. It kept that title for almost twenty years. 

Holden’s Interim Chairman and Managing Director, Kristian Aquilina said that the decision was a hard one to make, but that people’s preferences are changing over time.

“The decision to retire the Commodore nameplate has not been taken lightly by those who understand and acknowledge its proud heritage.” 

“The large sedan was the cornerstone of Australian and New Zealand roads for decades. But now with more choice than ever before, customers are displaying a strong preference for the high driving position, functionality and versatility of SUVs and Utes.”

So rest in peace, Commodore. You had a good run, and we’ll miss you. Thanks for all the good times.

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This Poor Guy Got Straight Up Shot Because An Influencer Wanted His URL

'Murica.

Influencers live in a weird world where they care far too much about things that none of us care about. Things like whether or not another influencer endorsed gummy vitamins or not, and making sure that they have the perfect URL. Turns out they’re willing to shoot people over that last one, and on Monday an influencer was sentenced to 14 years in jail because of it.

In 2015, Rossi Lorathio Adams II founded ‘State Snaps’ while he was at uni in Iowa. It turned into a bit of a social media empire like Brown Cardigan or Barstool Sports, and was mostly filled with pictures and videos of people partying hard. 

This sort of scene, but with way more nudity

The slogan “Do it for State!” became really popular amongst people who followed the pages, and was used to egg people on in the hopes that they’d do dumb shit and get on State Snaps. Think “Do it for the ’Gram” but with drunk frat boys.

The problem was that the website doitforstate.com was already owned by someone named E.D. who was using the site to promote concerts. 

Adams offered to buy the site for $20 000 USD, and when the offer was refused, he started sending E.D. gun emojis. Normal behaviour. 

Yeesh

So in 2017 Adams found E.D’s address online and asked his cousin – Sherman Hopkins Jr. – to go and threaten him with a gun and force him to transfer ownership of doitforstate.com. Again, very normal behaviour.

Speaking of wild crimes…

So a masked gunman shows up in E.D’s house, holds the gun to his head and tells him to go and open his computer. The details from here are a bit fuzzy, but we know there was a struggle and E.D. got shot in the leg, but eventually managed to get control on the gun and shoot the intruder in the chest. Both the men survived.

Hopkins, who did the actual intruding, was sentenced to 20 years in jail. Adams was the one who copped a 14 year sentence on Monday.

YES. GO.

The whole thing is a binfire. Don’t get between an influencer and a URL, whatever you do.

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The Golden Globes Reckon Women Didn't Direct Any Films This Year

Who's Greta Gerwig again?

Every time a movie award nominations list rolls around, people have opinions of who was snubbed and who deserved a place on the nominations list. Sometimes they’re personal views, and sometimes they’re calling out the gaping holes in a nominations list. Exhibit A: The Golden Globes nominations for best director doesn’t have a single woman on it.

The best director nominations list looks like this.

Martin Scorsese for The Irishman
Quentin Tarantino for Once Upon A Time… In Hollywood
Bong Joon-Ho for Parasite
Sam Mendes for 1917
Todd Phillips for Joker

Greta Gerwig seems to be the most glaringly obvious omission. She directed Little Women, which has managed a very impressive Rotten Tomatoes score of 96%.

Lulu Wang’s The Farewell was also incredibly well received, and for her role in it Awkwafina got a nomination for Best Actress in a Motion Picture – Musical or Comedy.

Lorene Scafaria (Hustlers), Olivia Wilde (Booksmart) and Marielle Heller (A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood) were also overlooked.

Of course those aren’t the only women who directed brilliant films this year, but they seem to be the names coming up most often. If those women didn’t make it on to a list that reckons Joker deserves a Golden Globe for best director, then we have a problem.

You’ll be absolutely shocked to know that the dude in charge of all the other dudes that choose who gets a nomination sees no problem with anything. Lorenzo Soria is the president of the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, and has said that “What happened is that we don’t vote by gender, we vote by film and accomplishment.”

The last time a woman was nominated for Best Director at the Golden Globes was 2015, when Ava DuVernay was nominated for her film Selma. She didn’t win. Other than DuVernay, only four other women have ever been nominated in the category.

So remember ladies, when making global hit movies, I guess we just need to be more accomplished!

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