Primary school was a pretty great time in hindsight. All the school discos, eating your weight in pizza pockets at the school canteen, and being able to make friends with people purely because they were sitting next to you. And of course, the fads that were in and out so quickly, and yet somehow we loved them all. Usually we loved these toys so much that they’d distract us from everything, so they’d be taken off us and then banned from the school entirely.
And so, it’s time for a loving ode to all the things we got banned from the playground.
Want more throwbacks? Listen to the GOAT Team chat Nikki Webster and Rebecca Black…
Scoobies
These colourful plastic strings were everywhere. I don’t actually know where the hundreds and hundreds of keyrings / friendship bracelets / hair pieces / whips that we made out of these went, but I have a suspicion it was the last one on that list that got them taken away from us. See also: Loom Bracelets
Tamagotchis
At the time I was horrified when I wasn’t able to look after the Tamagotchi I kept on a lanyard happy 24/7. What if it beeped while I was at school? In hindsight, I need to apologise to all my teachers that had to wrangle a class full of kids with beeping virtual pets.
Elastics
We all knew a friend of a friend’s cousin who could complete this game, even when the elastic moved as high as people’s shoulders (Or necks, which is probably why this one got banned). We also all knew an actual friend who stacked it and broke an arm playing this.
String Figures
Proving that if we couldn’t have fun with big loops of elastic, we’d have fun with small loops of string. Whoever could make the best Eiffel Tower was the coolest on the playground, and frankly I think we should go back to ordering society like that.
Marbles
If you gave a marble to somebody who had never seen one before, they wouldn’t assume there would be much you could do with the little glass spheres. Oh, how wrong they’d be. All they’d need to do was speak to an eleven year old with little idea of physics and a need to show off their skills to all their mates.
Pokemon Cards
The peak of banned school toys. Was battling and trading Pokemon cards some sort of underground childhood gambling ring? Cause in hindsight the trading operation got more serious than Ocean’s Eleven sometimes.
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