Bleats

Two Long Dormant Marvel Movie Villains Are Getting The Comeback They Deserve

Phase 4 of the Marvel Cinematic Universe is suddenly looking lit.

After 22 movies (and counting), the Marvel Cinematic Universe has arguably the largest roster of characters we’ve seen in recent memory. While it’s great to see all our faves on the big screen, it also means that some side-characters and villains get the short end of the stick when it comes to screentime and development.

However, it appears that the comic book movie behemoth has some exciting plans in the works for the return of two villains who have fallen out of the spotlight in recent years.

During a Reddit AMA, Marvel head honcho Kevin Feige was asked whether there are plans to bring back the villainous terror group, Ten Rings, from Iron Man and the Mandarin from Iron Man 3. Rather than say the usual Marvel PR spin of “we can’t reveal anything,” Feige straight up confirmed it with a simple “Yes.”

Oh my god…

Holy crap, this is big.

Ten Rings and the Mandarin are some of the most iconic villains in the Marvel comic universe and while the MCU has depicted them in one form or another in Iron Man and Iron Man 3, the two haven’t been heard from since the 2014 Marvel short film, All Hail The King, which ended on a massive Mandarin cliffhanger.

Now we’re not entirely sure just how the Ten Rings and the Mandarin will be incorporated back into the MCU following Avengers: Endgame, but there are rumours floating around that they will be the main villain in the upcoming Shang Chi film.

Okay, we’re stretching a bit there based on one simple “yes” answer from Feige and no one really knows how the Ten Rings or the Mandarin will be reintroduced, whether it’s part of a new Disney+ show or a hypothetical new Iron Man reboot.

One thing’s for sure, we’re totally down for whatever Marvel have in store and Phase 4 of the MCU suddenly looks incredibly exciting.

Today I Learned: James Cameron Nearly Made A Spider-Man Movie And It Was Basically Smut

We were THIS close to getting a horny, sweary Spider-Man.

From Spider-Man’s live-action film debut in 2002 with Spider-Man, the character has starred or featured in nine films, including the recent Avengers: Endgame. In fact, we’re about to get another Spider-Man solo adventure in the form of Spider-Man: Far From Home, which looks like a fun little romp.

But while you many know Spider-Man from the Tobey Maguire, Andrew Garfield, or Tom Holland movies, what you might not know is that James Cameron nearly made his own Spider-Man movie back in the 90s.

And hoo boy was it something of a smutty fustercluck.

Going off Cameron’s script, his idea was a pretty basic origin story of how Peter Parker gets his powers, falls in love with Mary Jane Watson, and ends up fighting against Electro and Sandman.

But this take on the character is something else entirely and is probably best summed up as “a creepy, sexually-frustrated adolescent whose spider powers are a metaphor for puberty.”

In a scene where Peter discovers his web-slinging abilities, the whole thing is unsubtly presented like the aftermath of a wet dream. Seriously, this is how the scene is described:

Something is causing the sheet to stick to him. He lifts it, revealing a sticky, white mass completely covering him, gluing him to his bedding. It is some silky substance webbing him into the covers. He cries out in dismay… struggling to free himself from the gluey strands. Where did it come from? He notices his wrists…”

Can’t imagine what Cameron is trying to get at there with this scene. To be fair, subtlety was never his strong suit.

That’s not webbing…is it?

Things somehow get kicked up a notch further with Peter and Mary Jane’s relationship. It starts off pretty tame with Peter using his new-found powers to spy on her getting changed. You know, stuff that horny adolescents usually get up to in coming-of-age movies.

But that’s about as normal as it gets as their relationship culminates with the pair having sex on top of the Brooklyn Bridge. Not only do they get freaky in public but Peter’s seduction technique basically involves him describing to Mary Jane how spiders mate in order to get her in the mood.

“Courtship among the spiders is highly ritualized. It varies from species to species. The male spider may circle the female, or wave his front legs… to signal that he is not prey.”

That sounds…sexy?

Smooth.

Now Cameron’s super-smutty adult take on Spider-Man ultimately didn’t take off as the movie studio involved went bankrupt but some of his ideas made it into the 2002 Spider-Man film, such as the organic web-slingers, Peter not needing glasses after getting his powers, and Uncle Ben dying at the hands of a car thief.

It certainly would’ve been a very interesting movie had Cameron managed to get it off the ground but whether it would’ve been good is a different question altogether. We’ll never know the answer as the movie will never get made now, but at least we can take heart knowing that we didn’t see Peter and Mary Jane get freaky on top of a bridge because that would’ve been as bad as the sex scene in Watchmen.

But look, things ultimately worked out in the end. Right now we have Tom Holland playing Peter Parker and his take is arguably the best we’ve seen on film, and Cameron too busy working on 32 Avatar movies or something to worry about anything else.

We’re in a good spot with Spider-Man right now so we don’t need to worry about any scenes that involve Peter’s webbing being a metaphor for a male teenager’s bodily fluids. Hopefully.

The Real Hero Of The Marvel Universe Is The Guy Who Sacrificed Himself For Iron Man

If it weren't for Ho Yinsen, things would've panned out quite differently for the MCU.

POTENTIAL SPOILERS FOR AVENGERS: ENDGAME!

YOU’VE BEEN WARNED!

Beyond wrapping up a bunch the loose ends and the colossal cliffhanger from Infinity WarAvengers: Endgame also represents journey’s end for a number of characters.

With Tony Stark being the first one to kick off the MCU way back in 2008 with Iron Man, it’s fitting that his story ends with him sacrificing his life to save the universe in Endgame.

But while Tony did the physical act of snapping Thanos away, the real hero who saved the entire MCU was in fact the man who saved and sacrificed his life for the billionaire over a decade ago: Ho Yinsen.

In a brilliant Twitter thread by @malihaness, they point out that Yinsen’s act of saving Tony’s life in that cave on May 2, 2008, in Iron Man meant that he indirectly ends up saving the entire Marvel universe some 15 years later in Endgame.

But Yinsen saving Tony was more than just one person saving another. @malihaness explains that Yinsen’s act unknowingly demonstrated the most heroic act a Muslim can do and how he was the embodiment of seeing the best in people.

Their explanation is simply fantastic and will make you have a greater appreciation of a character that was realistically portrayed as a Muslim who embodied that values of the Quran and ultimately sacrificed his life for the greater good.

It’s interesting to think how different the MCU would be had Tony not underwent the personal growth brought on by Yinsen’s sacrifice. For all we know, everything could’ve ended after just three movies instead of 22.

Iron Man may be the person who brought an end to Thanos’ Infinity Stone rampage but it all wouldn’t have been possible if it weren’t for Yinsen’s selfless act in that random cave all those years ago.

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