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It’s been a big day for… Listening to...

Apparently Lorde Is In Jail, Which Explains Where She’s Disappeared To This Last Year

#FreeLorde

Here’s a question: where the hell is Lorde?

I know she’s taken a musical hiatus this last year – fair enough, sometimes you need a break to get the creative juice re-flowing – but she’s basically disappeared off the face of the earth.

Lorde hasn’t posted anything on Instagram for over a year and hasn’t attended any huge social or Hollywood events – unless catching the subway counts as a social event.

Again I ask, where the hell is Lorde?

The answer is something right out of a James Bond movie: apparently, Lorde is in jail. Yes, seriously.

According to Lorde fans online, the singer is at risk of serving jail time following an alleged $3,000 fine she refuses to pay to New Zealand authorities.

To save their favourite pop star from serving time behind bars, stans created the Twitter #FreeLorde to raise awareness.

It’s all very random and salacious. It’s also very not true.

It all started with a story courtesy of New Zealand’s Newshub, which explained that the NZ National Party was thinking of creating a policy that fines the parents of children who leave school early and leave their studies incomplete.

The potential fine would be, you guessed it, $3,000.

As Lorde didn’t complete her final year of high school due to her 2013 debut album Pure Heroin taking off, her family would be required to pay the $3,000 fine under the new policy.

Long story short: Lorde isn’t in jail nor is she, or any of her family members, going to jail.

This is good news for her, but it leaves me with even less answers than when I started. If she isn’t in jail and she’s not making new music, then where the hell is Lorde? And what has she been doing for the last year?