Earlier this week, I found myself with time to kill in Sydney’s south-west, and immediately my mind went to Sizzler. I’d been dreaming of visiting the last Sizzler in NSW for months, falling asleep to images of a well-stocked dessert bar playing across my eyelids.
Since Pizza Hut buffets are no more, and my local RSL abandoned theirs years ago in favour of a swanky restaurant that appeals to millennials’ Instagram sensibilities, Sizzler is one of the few remaining affordable buffet options in Sydney.
I’d already tried to relive the dining experiences of my childhood closer to home; I visited the Pizza Hut store in Waterloo that claims to recreate the dine-in experience we all remember so fondly, but I was left wanting. The ‘dessert bar’ consisted of a station with one flavour of ice cream, three toppings, and three kinds of sprinkles. Where was the mousse, the jelly, the pav? A few toppings and one flavour of ice cream do not a dessert bar make.
Sure, I can pick any hotel in the city, pay $45 a head and eat my fill of oysters and finger sandwiches and petit fours, but I’m a simple woman with simple tastes. I wanted cheese toast and spag bol and soft serve with as many toppings as I could fit on top. Sizzler is the only place I’d be able to satisfy this incredibly specific, nostalgia-driven craving.
So, on Monday night, I grabbed my mum to ensure maximum childhood nostalgia, and visited the last Sizzler in NSW, which can be found in Campbelltown, 53km from Sydney’s CBD, and 40km from NSW’s second-last Sizzler restaurant in Kogarah, which closed last year.
Campbelltown Sizzler
Campbelltown Sizzler is in the middle of a plethora of restaurants: Maccas, Hungry Jack’s, Oporto, Outback Steakhouse, and even Hooters, so there’s fierce competition. Despite this competition, Sizzler has the second highest rating on Google of any of these restaurants, which fills me with a strange sense of pride, as though I’m somehow responsible for this 3.9 rating (I’m not).
We ignored all of those buffet-less places and headed into Sizzler. For $26 each, we had free reign over the salad and dessert bars, and they were nice enough to offer senior and student discounts for my mum (the senior) and me (the student). I also opted for unlimited drinks for $3.95, which is a bloody bargain, and cheaper than the cost of buying one drink at most restaurants.
I made a beeline for the buffet before sitting down, because I’m an adult and I don’t need to pretend I’m not there for one reason and one reason only. I was amazed by the array of salads – there were eight different ones on offer – but I ignored them, because again, I’m an adult, and if I don’t want to eat salad, I don’t have to.
Next to the soups was a make-your-own-taco bar, with still-warm tortillas as well as nacho chips and taco shells. Everything you’d ever want to put on a taco was available, and I piled my tacos high with mince, cheese, lettuce, guac, sour cream, and pico de gallo. The taco bar couldn’t be accused of being authentic Mexican food, but that’s not the point of Sizzler; the point is home-style cooking that’s familiar, and that’s what the tacos are: the kind of thing my Anglo Mum makes at home.
The Holy Grail.
In typical buffet fashion, I got too excited and grabbed more food than I could actually handle; it wasn’t until after I’d sat down with my plate of spag bol that I realised the tacos had hit the spot, and I hadn’t even visited the most important part of the buffet yet. So I discarded the spag bol (and felt very guilty about it, because I hate wasting food!) and made my way to my primary reason for visiting Sizzler: the dessert bar.
It was just as I’d remembered it. Chocolate and vanilla soft serve, several kinds of sprinkles and cookie bits, three flavours of topping, jelly, sticky date pudding, chocolate mousse, apple crumble, panna cotta, AND pavlova.
I started with chocolate mousse and chocolate and vanilla ice cream with chocolate topping, cookie bits and sprinkles, and then I went back for pavlova and a second serving of ice cream. It was glorious, and it was everything I’d hoped for.
My dream had been fully realised: I was transported back to the buffets of my childhood, when dessert was the primary objective, and you always ate way more than you could handle.
The best dessert ever, because I made it myself.
So the buffets we remember fondly still exist, but they’re becoming rarer. If we all remember them so fondly, why have so many Sizzlers shut down? Why has Sizzler HQ decided not to invest any more money in their Australian arm? When did Australians stop enjoying a classic buffet?
I shouldn’t generalise; not all Australians have abandoned the land of the all-you-can-eat. There are still nine Sizzlers in Queensland, somehow, which is as impressive as it is confusing. What draws Queenslanders to buffets while the rest of the country turns away?
If nostalgia isn’t enough to get you in the door, think of the value. They’re a great way to feed a family if you’re on a budget, considering the tiered pricing for kids under 12, with kids under 4 eating free. There’s something for everyone, even fussy eaters like me. You get free cheese toast delivered to your table soon after sitting down. And did I mention the dessert bar?
So what gives? Why have we given up on buffets? Is it because a plate piled high with as much food as it can carry doesn’t look good on the ‘gram? Is it because Sizzler doesn’t serve the staple food of many millennials, smashed avo on toast? Folks: THEY HAVE CHEESE TOAST. IT’S BETTER.
When I was at the register at Sizzler, I told the two women working that I was visiting the restaurant specifically because it was the last in NSW. We all shared a sad look, and both of them told me they didn’t understand why Sizzler was no longer beloved by Australians.
I didn’t have an answer for them then, and I still don’t, because I don’t know what’s not to like. But as a fan of buffets, value for money, and nostalgia, I’m glad I made the trip, and I hope the current craze for retro Australiana sees the humble buffet return in all its gluttonous glory.