It’s been a big day for… Listening to...

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It’s been a big day for… Listening to...

An Investigation Into Why This Mystery Taco Was Left Inside A Library Book

Mr. Taco, in the library, with a taco.

There isn’t much in life that can’t be made better with tacos. 

Girls night? Tacos. 

Netflix and chill? Tacos. 

Sitting in a dark room, crying, pondering your existence and wondering about your purpose on this planet? All of the tacos. 

Exactly. Source: Giphy

But there is one thing that tacos should not be used for, and that’s a bookmark. Eating tacos while reading is a big yes, but using them to mark your spot in a novel is… questionable. 

Alas, I present you the mystery of the taco left inside a library book: 

It’s something straight out of an Agatha Christie novel. 

People Book nerds online are outraged. 

https://twitter.com/emilyt804/status/1172904481333350401

Me? I have a lot of questions. I’m about to Sherlock Holmes the crap outta this soft shelled bad boy. 

Thanks. Source: Giphy

Let’s start with the facts. 

The book was turned to an Indiana library – AKA the state in which Garfield is set. Yes, as in Garfield the cat who likes to sleep and eat. 

Interesting. Source: Giphy

Fact number two: the taco looks to be a white tortilla wrap filled with beef (?), lettuce, and lots of cheese. Translation: a it’s a pretty sub-par taco. So it definitely was not made by a foodie. Or it was made by a foodie with a serious hangover looking for the most basic meal ever. 

Or maybe the taco was store bought. 

Was the taco made or purchased? Inconclusive. 

It ain’t over yet. Source: Giphy

Fact number three: the book, from what I can tell, is some kind of poetry or play. Judging by the structure of the lines in the middle of the page and the short, stacked sentences, it is not a story book. 

Now that we have the facts, here’s what we don’t know: 

– The title of the book. 

– The exact year and date it was borrowed. 

– If the borrower was an adult or child, male/female/other. 

– Why the taco was forgotten. 

– If the book borrower knew that they misplaced their taco. 

Of the above facts, the title of the book is the most irrelevant in my opinion. We have already concluded it is a poetry book of sorts which is the most important information. Only intellects read poetry and women are naturally the more intellectual race (don’t @ me), so the book must have been borrowed by a woman. 

Women above a certain age are generally mothers or working full time jobs, so don’t have time to indulge in poetry. It’s trashy romance novels or nothing. So I will also assume the book borrower was young. Probably college-aged. The presence of the taco also confirms this – college students love a cheap, carby, cheesy meal. I can also vouch for this. 

Hey look, it’s me. Source: Giphy

The aforementioned hangover is probably why the taco was forgotten. That, or a sudden emergency which caused the taco-loving book borrower to quickly and unexpectedly abandon their meal in the pages of an unsuspecting library book. 

The emergency is unknown but, also, irrelevant. 

If you’re still with me, dear reader, if means you care about this mystery. So, finally, here is my conclusion: 

The taco belonged to a hungover college student in Indiana with a pretty flowery name like Rose or Lily. She was a female, probably studying an arts degree or something equally pretentious which explains her desire to read poetry in her spare time. She also probably has a cat called Garfield and, to this day, is wondering what the hell happened to her taco. 

What can I say, some mysteries haunt us forever.