Let’s be honest: the 2019 election campaign began a long, long time ago and really hit into high gear when Scott Morrison succeeded Malcolm Turnbull in that sudden leadership spill last August because… um…
But now, finally, after months and months and months and a copy’n’paste NZ election campaign and endless text messages from Clive Palmer and a budget which was basically just a stump speech replete with election promises and a lot of very confusing rhetoric about electric cars, we have an actual election date!
Morrison has visited the Governor General and that means that it all begins now! Parliament has been dissolved! Polling day is Saturday 18 May! Deploy the explosive collars and begin the Battle Royale!
Can… can we fit all candidates with one of these things?
So this means we have weeks of official electioneering ahead as the PM attempts to turn a less than stellar eight months of power, the retirement of some of the government’s most popular members (including the MP deemed most likely to lead the Liberals to victory, Julie Bishop) and two years of negative polling into an unlikely victory.
Meanwhile the alternative PM, Labor’s Bill Shorten, has the challenge of alerting Australia to his existence – somewhat hamstrung by the fact that those who do know he’s a thing aren’t exactly falling madly in love with him.
He’s the guy on the left. The other guy would be better, though.
And while polling has tightened somewhat it’s still indicating a likely Labor victory, which means that Morrison could yet be the second shortest serving non-caretaker Prime Minister in Australian history. Take a bow, Chris Watson and the Labour government of 1903: you’re still number one!
It’s an uphill battle for both parties, though: this is the first election with 151 electorates (two new ones in Victoria, one fewer in SA) and the boundary redistribution means that the Coalition have a nominal 72 seats and Labor have 73. So in other words, it’s anyone’s to lose!
In any case, maybe both Scotty and Billy will learn that the REAL election victory wasn’t who wins a majority of seats in the House of Representatives, but the friendships they made along the way.