Tourists planning to take a trip to the picturesque bay of Saint-Brieuc might want to reschedule if they want to avoid a stinky, toxic gas death. It’s over Stephen King – go home, because you’ll never write about anything as horrifying as this.
The bay of Saint-Brieuc in northwest France has been covered by tonnes of toxic green algae and while it’s not got quite the level of sentience as The Blob, it might just have a higher body count.
At least three people have died from inhaling the sulfuric gas, but an investigative journalist pointed out that any number of the 20 coastal deaths annually could’ve involved gas inhalation.
Credit: Nicolas LE CORRE/Gamma-Rapho via Getty Images
The algae didn’t appear overnight – in fact, after decades of the infestation making life terrible for Saint-Brieuc residents, environmental groups like Extinction Rebellion are finally getting involved and after investigating, it turns out, pigs are to blame.
The killer slime is apparently caused by an abundance of nitrates in the seawater coming from agricultural areas. The population of pigs outnumbers the humans in Saint-Brieuc and and their poop is the culprit. Even the town’s seaweed plough can’t keep up with the growth.
I just learned that the fear of slime is called myxophobia and that is absolutely what this story has given me. I’m never going to look at a lagoon the same way. While algae looks terrifying, only some types are actually harmful, further adding to the confusion.
Unfortunately, we can’t just go ahead and take a flamethrower to every inch of algae we see. For one, the explosion would rival a Michael Bay movie. It also produces a rather important gas to make up for all that hydrogen sulfide. Given the whole burning Amazon thing, we shouldn’t be taking our other vegetation for granted.
Which means that we’re going to have to learn to coexist with our killer slime overlords. A good rule of thumb – if it looks like pea soup and feels like it too, it’s probably not the best body of water to be swimming in.