Kumail Nanjiani Got Jacked For Marvel, But His Caption About It Is The Real Winner

To no one's surprise, it takes quite a bit to be a Marvel-approved superhero.

If someone brought up the name Kumail Nanjiani, chances are you’ll recognise him as either a) that dude off Silicon Valley, b) that dude who wrote that Oscar-nominated movie The Big Sick a few years ago, or c) one of the new peeps who will be in Marvel’s crazy-sounding Eternals movie.

Well it’s time to think about Kumail Nanjiani in a way you probably never expected: swole Marvel-approved superhero.

The Eternals star shared a photo to Instagram of his new physique and, well, the dude is ripped like a brick sh*thouse. We expected him to get in shape since he’s in a Marvel movie and all, but seeing him with bulging biceps and washboard abs is something else (in a good way).

Unsurprisingly, the internet has reacted accordingly, by which I mean with excessive amounts of frothing and thirsting. Kumail has literally become the thirst trap his character on Silicon Valley wishes to be.

But the best part about Kumail unveiling his new, swole bod on Instagram is the caption he wrote about what he went through in order to become jacked.

Going from normal to spandex-wearing Marvel shape takes a heap of work and resources, and Kumail is refreshingly honest about what it takes to achieve a bod that’s worthy to be part of the Eternals.

Writing how he “wanted to transform” how he looked, Kumail acknowledged he wouldn’t have been able do it had he not gotten a “full year with the best trainers and nutritionists paid for by the biggest studio in the world” before praising the *checks notes* five(!) personal trainers and the catering company that made it all possible, as well as his wife, writer Emily V. Gordon, for “putting up with [him] complaining and talking about only working out and dieting for the last year.” 

Kumail also nailed the reason why he (and many other people) didn’t bother to become ripped in the first place, writing “it would’ve been impossible without [the] resources and time” afforded by Disney and Marvel.

Some Hollywood stars rave on about how they got their bod through sheer hard work and discipline (*cough* Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson *cough*) while not realising how lucky they are to be afforded the resources and time to get in shape for a living.

We all know that getting into shape isn’t an easy thing to do but it’s pretty nice to see Kumail Nanjiani acknowledge how privileged he is while also recognising how building a body fit for a Marvel movie isn’t something that’s achievable for the the average person.

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'Watchmen' Unexpectedly Told 2019's Best Love Story, Not 'Marriage Story'

We're all suckers for good love story at the end of the day.

Spoilers for Watchmen and Marriage Story! You’ve been warned!

Marriage Story is about the relationship between Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson’s characters over the course of several years, and how the pair manage to still hold deep affection for one another even after they go through an absolutely gutwrenching divorce.

But despite telling an absolutely compelling story spread out across several years about a love that was ultimately doomed in the end, Watchmen did the same trick in telling Angela Abar and Cal’s (who is actually Dr. Manhattan in disguise) story and managed to pull it off even better than Marriage Story despite the show being infinitely weirder and far more complicated.

The thing with an immortal god-like being like Dr. Manhattan is that human emotions don’t mean as much to someone who can see the future and can literally create life from nothing. But what if this god-like being could learn to love? What if this being – who was human before an accident turned him into a god – held onto some semblance of humanity in the form of love?

As it turns out, it is beautiful, intense and as tragic as any all-time great love story and yet it subverts all the usual tropes we’ve come to expect from these things, such as the meet-cutes, the big arguments and the love at first sights.

Dr. Manhattan essentially pitches his and Angela’s love story to her the first time they met in the form of several predictions masquerading as lame pick-up lines.

We soon find out how Dr. Manhattan grew to love Angela even though he doesn’t know when it happened, he just knows he’s always loved her (time is weird in Watchmen). He also knows full well it will end tragically. And yet, he still approaches Angela and is willing to lose his memories for a decade and eschew any thoughts of helping humanity so he and Angela can be happy, even if it is only temporary.

That’s so selfish and yet also incredibly human.

But you really don’t, do you?

This wouldn’t work if the other side of this relationship story didn’t hold up and thankfully, Angela’s side of this Watchmen narrative is equally well-crafted and doesn’t sacrifice her own unique storyline in service of something else.

Somewhere along the way, Angela also falls in love with Dr. Manhattan/Cal and she too is aware that it will end tragically. But like her naked blue husband, she too is willing to take a ride down the “Tunnel of Love” because, well, love baby.

And when Angela and Dr. Manhattan’s relationship finally makes its way to Watchmen‘s present, it is capped off by a simple moment that makes you realise that this show is really nothing more than a love story.

He sees Angela arm herself in an attempt to save him despite the odds heavily stacked against her and it’s in there he says her risking her life to save him despite knowing she’ll lose is the moment he fell in love with her (again, Dr. Manhattan sees time differently to us).

Watchmen told a simply love story in the most complex way possible but it told the hell out of it. At the end of the day, we’re all suckers for a good love story where two people will fight through anything just to be together, and Angela and Dr. Manhattan’s time-jumping, mind-bending relationship is the purest manifestation of that.

Marriage Story showed us how love can still survive in the face of adversity, but there was no better example of it than Watchmen‘s Angela Abar and Dr. Manhattan’s seemingly doomed romance.

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There's An Actual Reason Why 'The Simpsons' Has Gone On For So Long

And don't be surprised if it keeps going on forever.

The Simpsons is a bit of an anomaly in that it’s not only an animated show starring yellow-skinned characters, it’s managed to outlast its contemporary TV show rivals to become the longest-ever running sitcom that’s come out of the U.S.

Even as the show shuffles into irrelevancy and the quality continues to slip, The Simpsons still chugs along and will do so until at least 2021 when its 32nd season airs.

But here’s the question: why has The Simpsons gone on for so long?

In a word: money.

The Simpsons was brought to life in an era where TV syndication was a big thing. In ELI5 terms, syndication where a studio creates a TV show, makes a heap of episodes of it (usually 100) if the ratings are good, and then sell the broadcasting rights to TV networks for a huge chunk of change once the show is done.

Most shows last only a couple of seasons, syndicated TV shows usually last around five-ish seasons and really popular shows like Friends go for about 10. But The Simpsons was a different beast as the consistently solid ratings meant and its presence in the public consciousness meant there’s no reason to cancel the show.

Throw in the various merch, media and various tie-in deals associated with the show, this meant meant it was valuable to keep The Simpsons alive than dead.

Now having said that, The Simpsons has found itself in a bit of a weird syndication/money conundrum.

Making The Simpsons costs the studio money (the costs are split between Fox Broadcasting Company (FBC) and 20th Century Fox) but they more than make this shortfall up in merch sales and what not. But since no one expected it to be as popular is it is, The Simpsons just keeps churning out episodes, meaning that Fox can’t sell the broadcasting rights to TV networks for that sweet, sweet syndication money just yet.

Those old TV syndication deals the show initially started with hinge on the condition that Fox keeps airing new and original episodes, meaning that there’s financial incentive to keep The Simpsons going rather than killing the cash cow right now.

What this old syndication deal also means is thatFox isn’t able sell the broadcasting rights to streaming services either, which is a bummer since most people watch stuff on streamers rather than old-school TV networks these days.

Now Fox did manage to broker a massive $1 billion streaming deal with US network, FX, back in 2013 only after much legal wrangling and figuring out how to make it work alongside the limitations of The Simpsons‘ old TV syndication deal. But even though that’s a huge deal, it’s still far less than what the Fox could’ve gotten for it.

So if there’s so much money to be made in streaming and syndication, why not just cancel The Simpsons now?

Well here’s the thing, if there’s a lot of money to be made if The Simpsons were to be canceled today, there’s even more money to be made in the future if the show just kept going and banking more episodes. More content means the licencing fee in which the show can be sold to other networks and streaming services will also continue to rise.

So in a weird instance of irony, The Simpsons‘ crazy longevity is really the only thing that’s saving it from being cancelled at the moment because people have invested literally decades into this and they’re too far in to pull out now when the cash cow continues to get fatter and the prospect of a MASSIVE pay day is seemingly so close.

However, this could all change now that Disney has acquired 20th Century Fox as this means the FBC will have to foot the production costs of The Simpsons all by itself and there’s no guarantee these expenses will be recouped through the previous model of merch and licensing sales.

If Fox can’t recoup those expenses, no new episodes can be made, and those old TV syndication deals are voided and this leaves Disney in a good position to rework all that old paperwork for even more moolah but in its favour rather than Fox’s.

So to sum up this incredibly complicated spiel about why The Simpsons is still going: there’s money to be made the longer it goes on hence why it’ll never die despite all our protests over how the show is well past its prime.

But with so much money on the line, it’s more likely The Simpsons will end because the writers and producers are over it rather than any money pissing contest between Fox and Disney. No one knows when The Simpsons will end but when/if it happens, it’ll be a big day for fans and a huge pay day for those who have stuck with the show since 1989.

Always be in the loop with our snackable podcast breaking the biggest story of the day. Subscribe to It’s Been A Big Day For… on your favourite podcast app.

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