I consider myself a mostly functioning adult. I don’t understand how taxes work, but I pay them. I’m good at keeping on top of vacuuming, but don’t remember the last time I cleaned the washing machine filter. I’d love to move to the next stage of being a responsible human and get a pet, but my lease doesn’t allow us to have animals. I think I have a solution to that last one which doesn’t involve taking your pet to a mate’s house during inspections: my old Tamagotchi.
Yep, Tamagotchis. I had purple one that I wore on a Bratz lanyard, and I’m wearing it in every single photo of me taken in 2006. It was the first time I’d fully taken responsibility for anything other than feeding our cat occasionally, a job that Mum would do if I forgot. There was no backup Mum to look after my tamagotchi though, mostly because nobody else in my family cared about it except me.
Seeing as I can’t get a puppy, or a senior cat, or even a goldfish in my current place, I’ve found myself really wishing I had a pet. It’s not just me either. I’ve had conversations with friends about attempting to pet neighbourhood cats, crying over ferret videos, and volunteering to walk shelter dogs as a way to cope.
Tamagotchis might not bark, but they beep and boop constantly. You can take them with you to more places than a dog, and cleaning up their poop is a far more pleasant experience than that of dealing with actual dog crap IRL.
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Perhaps this is desperation, and every time I see someone walking their dog I’m going to go slightly more nuts until I snap and adopt every animal in the shelter. There’s a good chance of that happening anyway if I’m honest, but I think dusting off my favourite digital friend may at least hold me back for a few more months.
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