When Will The Puffy-Chest Bros Stop Being So Angry At Rosie Batty Literally Just Talking?

Pay careful attention to any man that complains about women speaking out against violence.

CONTENT WARNING: violence against women and children

Before we get into what people have been saying about domestic violence campaigner Rosie Batty, it’s worth remembering what led her to the public’s attention in the first place.

Batty was involved with Greg Anderson, a violent man who was prone to physical outbursts. After the birth of their son Luke, Anderson physically assaulted her and she left the relationship, taking Luke with her.

Aside from Anderson’s multiple run ins with the law, including death threats against a housemate and accessing child porn on a library computer, he also carried out multiple assaults on Batty for the next decade, despite her having  intervention orders against Anderson.

And then in February 2014 he cornered their son Luke in the cricket nets following sports practice, and stabbed him to death.  Anderson died of self-inflicted wounds shortly after during a stand off with police. Luke was 11 years old.

Batty has experienced intimate partner violence and lost her child to the man who abused her throughout their relationship. And somehow she is not just standing after all that trauma but has been a tireless advocate for victims of domestic violence in Australia, setting up the foundation that bears her son’s name and becoming an officer of the Order of Australia (AO) in this year’s Queen’s Birthday Honours.

And this sheer strength, this stunning courage in the face of unimaginable trauma, has scared the hell out of a lot of deeply inadequate men over the years.

Like, for example, CFMEU boss John Setka, who is himself facing charges at the moment, including pleading guilty to allegations he harassed a woman.

His alleged claim – that Batty’s work in anti-violence advocacy had led to men having fewer rights – has forced the hand of the CFMEU, the wider union movement and for Labor leader Anthony Albanese to call for his expulsion from the Labor Party and sacking from the union.

It’s worth adding that Setka denies saying anything of the sort and that his comments were taken out of context.

Setka’s career is definitely over, and because it’s 2019 his cause will doubtless be taken up by Mens Rights Inadequates who believe that he, like them, is the victim – along with every other male held to account for their words and actions.

He’s not the first angry bloke to feel cool about telling a woman to shut up for talking about violence against women, and neither will he be the last to out himself as being the exact sort of person women should be wary about being near. Nothing’s a red flag like a dude that gets all #notallmen when women’s experience is mentioned.

But as to the question posed in the headline of this piece: when will bros stop getting angry about a woman talking? The answer is simple.

When the majority of men are finally brave enough to take responsibility for the dark side of masculinity – especially the violence that men mete out to women, to other men and to themselves – that this sort of cowardly, pathetic complaining will stop.

And that day cannot come soon enough.

If you’re experiencing crisis, contact Lifeline on 131 114 or;  or BeyondBlue on 1300 224 636 or 

National Sexual Assault, Family & Domestic Violence Counselling Line: 1800 737 732

If You're Checking Out A List On Where To Randomly Approach Women, You're A Jerk

Anyone wondering why women worry about dudes in public, here's your Exhibit A.

It’s been a while since we’ve heard of Daryush Valizadeh, better known as self-proclaimed pickup artist Roosh V, the 39-year-old master of seduction who lives with his mum and leader the Return Of Kings male supremacy organisation.

But a newly-circulating guide on where to randomly approach women in Melbourne has brought him and his deeply vile outlook back into the public eye. Yay?

We’re choosing not to link to it, because you’re not a monster.

It’s worth noting that this particular thread comes from 2017-18, but it’s doing the rounds for anyone interested in how to hunt down women in public, as though they’re sexual Pokemon to be collected.

And a document where men share tips about locations to approach women takes a particularly sinister edge coming as it does after several high-profile murders of women in Melbourne.

For every person that argues that “toxic masculinity” isn’t the problem because *they personally* haven’t murdered anyone hashtag not all men,  here’s a cool insight into how a number of men view women: angry that they won’t dispense sex when expected, discussing strategies to get them alone, talking about the action to which they’re entitled. It’s abhorrent – and also pathetic.

Oh, and there’s a hell of a lot of racism packed in there too just in case you need more reason to think that maybe, just maybe, these aren’t Nice Guys Just Having A Bit Of Fun after all.

Interestingly enough ol’ Rooshy himself has recently embraced hardcore conservative Christianity although his now strident criticisms of premarital sex and provocative behaviour remain exclusively directed at women. What’s more, he continues to sell his pick-up manuals and, as this demonstrates, host forums on how to hunt women.

So that’s a thing.

Anyway, let’s say – again – something which should be self-evident but which society has failed to teach men:

Don’t bother women who are going about their business in Melbourne, and also everywhere else in the world. 

And if you’re responding to this with the fury of someone who thinks that women owe you attention and sexual access whenever you want it, maybe take a moment to punch yourself in the crotch.

Seriously, dudes. Be better.

Gillette's New Ad Starring A Trans Man Is Not For Diversity Points, It's Good Business

Hey, maybe this inclusivity thing will catch on!

Earlier this year Gillette decided to bring down the very foundations of civilised society – or, to put it another way, made an ad for their company.

The ad in question – ‘The Best Men Can Be’ – basically said to their predominantly male user base “hey, think of the example you set”.

And oh! the outcry! And oh! the promises from people that they would never ever ever ever buy a Gillette product again because suggesting that men be more responsible for and thoughtful about their actions is downright misandrist, for some reason.

And obviously Gillette were punished for their activist stance on whether men should be dicks or not by… um, absolutely no drop in sales in the aftermath.

And so now we come to their new advertisement:

The new video, featuring Canadian trans man Samson Bonkeabantu Brown, is similarly moving and poignant, showing a proud dad teaching his son to shave for the first time.

It’s something which cis men can easily relate to: learning to shave is a big deal as a teenager, and the anxiety about starting to develop facial hair too early or too late is very real. And for many of us it was a big deal when our dad showed us how it was done.

So watching this young man, whose transition has now reached the point where he’s growing facial hair, going through this rite of passage is another powerful reminder of just how similar people are.

And needless to say, there’s no shortage of reaction online demonstrating the sort of carefully reasoned, fact-based and well-expressed commentary which is the hallmark of frothing bigots on the internet.

However, this is all fine from the company’s perspective, because that’s how publicity works.

The angry Reddit community who (unsuccessfully) set out to make the previous ad the most disliked in history? That gave massive engagement numbers, which drove video shares and media attention.

In fact, all the evidence suggests that taking a firm stance on what masculinity means in 2019 has done nothing but help Gillette and set them apart from their competitors.

In fact, despite predictions, the follow up research showed that the ad was a hit – especially with women, who are far more engaged with the shaving (ahem) “conversation”. Short version of long data: men didn’t change their brand behaviour, even if they were supposedly furious about the virtue signalling, but women did.

So this new, inclusive, trans-visibility-enhancing ad might be genuinely admirable, but it’s also just smart business. It’s win-win!

Except for online bigots, but… actually, that seems like a bonus win.

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