Kristen Stewart Flexes Her Character Versatility In The New Charlie's Angels Trailer, Is That Enough For Ya?

Say it, out loud.

The announcement of the Charlie’s Angels film reboot has upset some OG fans, and that’s fine- you’re entitled to have your hang-ups and feel personally victimised but just so you know, I don’t stand with you.

After watching the trailer for the new Charlie’s Angels, I’m a convert – and I haven’t even seen the movie yet.

Me laughing at how whipped I am | Charlie’s Angels (2019) | Sony Pictures

I couldn’t peel my eyes away from Kristen Stewart, but that might just be because I’m a raging queer and she’s this incredible, ethereal being to us. It also could be attributed to her unbelievable versatility, stepping into the role of multiple characters within the film.

Kristen takes on the role of a jockey, a hotel housekeeper, Soul Cycle-goer, and the list goes on. Wigs and disguises are giving me major Hannah Montana vibes, but if she said she rode horsies on the side, I’d believe her.

K-Stew getting the best of both worlds | Charlie’s Angels (2019) | Sony Pictures

Not only is Kristen Stewart totally killing it in her scenes but overall, this version feels like a genuine step up from the original Charlie’s Angels movie. I know that’s a big claim, but I stand by it.

Kristen Stewart, Naomi Scott and Ella Balinska are wickedly cool, hot and badass, making the perfect diverse trio of women to carry on the legacy left behind.

Sisterhood prevails y’all | Charlie’s Angels (2019) | Sony Pictures

Ariana Grande, Miley Cyrus and Lana Del Ray are responsible for the soundtrack, it’s produced and directed by Elizabeth Banks and Noah Centineo plays a hot, smart science boy – am I allowed to breathe? Ever?

In case we didn’t catch it, I’m bullshit excited to see the Charlie’s Angels reboot when it drops in cinemas November 15th 2019. And for the record, I would 100% let Kristen Stewart kick me in the face.

She owns me | Charlie’s Angels (2019) | Sony Pictures

What Ever Happened To Fist-Clenching Power Ballads And What Did We Do To Deserve The Drought?

Limp fist.

First and foremost, thanks for clicking through because it’s obvious that you get where I’m coming from, and I find real comfort in that.

Welcome to the driest time for fist-clenching power ballads, where we are dragging ourselves around the Top 40 charts in pure agony, in search of a song that will infiltrate the soul and do what songs were intended to do.

The Resident | FOX

It starts with a melody that plucks on the heart-strings, playing a tune that sings of true love or heartache (the good stuff) and you feel it. You feel the warmth spread from your chest and up your neck, forcing your hair to stand up on end and your face to feel hot. It spreads through your whole body to the tips of your fingers until you can’t take it anymore; your hands clench into a fist. You’re born again.

Parks and Recreation | NBC

There’s something to be said for the 80s, 90s and 00s producing some of the best power ballads, maybe ever. I’m talking Whitney, Journey, *NSYNC – the list of niche fist-clenching power ballad creators is where I thrive, and where music thrived.

On the record, music today have allowed pop music to flourish from a guilty pleasure to genuinely very great feel-good bops.

Miley Cyrus & Charli XCX | BBC Radio 1

I have conducted extensive research to conclude the definitive beginning and end of the fist-clench worthy songs.

1972, Led Zepplin invented the power ballad with Stairway To Heaven. No further comments will be made or heard, this is bible.

And in 2007, the final power ballad sounded, straight out of the gate with these big-ass, emo AF lyrics:

If the heart is always searching,
Can you ever find a home

Admit it, your fist is already clenched. The Jonas Brothers gave us the final fist-clenching power ballad with When You Look Me In The Eyes and that’s the cold-hard truth.

A thing of beauty and grace. For the culture.

So, where do we go from here? Why did the power ballad die out? Was When You Look Me In The Eyes just far too powerful to ever top?

The only thing to do, aside from hope and pray the power ballad makes a comeback, is listen to the classics. Start yourself off with these and feel where it takes you.

Don’t Stop Believing – Journey

I Want It That Way – Backstreet Boys

I Don’t Want To Miss A Thing – Aerosmith

We Belong Together – Mariah Carey

I Have Nothing – Whitney Houston

And just for my own ego, this is the closest I’ve been to a power ballad since The Jonas Brothers. A little band called LANY from Los Angeles have managed to reignite my faith in the future of power ballads with Hericane. Give it a listen for yourself and may your fists clench in solidarity.

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