Bleats

Channing Tatum And His Ballsack On Canvas Is The Answer To Your Bland Decor

You know you need this in your house and life.

Let’s get this out of the way: Channing Tatum is a good looking man. He is so damn gorgeous you just want to hang some art of him on a wall and have that smouldering – and occasionally goofy – stare in your life forever.

Well good news, folks because you can legit to exactly that.

Artist Chris Mann – whose work is described as “charged with emotional resonance, rife with sensuality” – has decided to gift the world with an original painting of Channing Tatum. But it’s not just any portrait of the Magic Mike star.

It’s an oil-on-wood painting depicting Channing sitting a wearing nothing but a grey jumper that he’s tugging on suggestively with his right hand. His right leg is bent upwards to hide his modesty but he definitely got the angle wrong as his surprisingly clean-shaven ballsack is in full view.

It is a goddamn masterpiece for the ages and you need to feast your eyes on it right now:

Credit: Chris Mann/Ebay

I am the furthest from an art expert you’re going to get but having a half-naked Channing Tatum (and his scrotum) on a canvas in my room will more than offset the bland decor and win me brownie points with my arty mates.

If you want this gem of a painting then you better get onto Ebay quickly with a fat stack of money because it ain’t cheap. At the time of writing, the Channing painting is going for about $1,575USD (about $2,320AUD, not including the $35 for international shipping) and there’s less than three days left on the clock to lodge a bid.

Look at it this way: some bland decor will set you back around a few hundred but a portrait of half-nude Channing Tatum with his balls hanging out is priceless and getting it for $2-3k is a bargain.

The New Margot Robbie-Centric Birds Of Prey Poster Is So Awful It's Actually Brilliant

Should've renamed it "The Harley Quinn Movie (oh and the Birds of Prey might turn up)."

It seems like all things are coming up Margot Robbie and Harley Quinn. After getting officially confirmed for DC’s new take on Suicide Squad, the actress and character is now front and centre on the new Birds of Prey poster.

Margot shared the new poster on her Instagram and folks, it is… something, and not necessarily a good something.

The concept of having all the other Birds of Prey characters float around a giant Harley Quinn like birds circling the head of dazed cartoon character (because of all the voices in her head, geddit?) is pretty cool on paper, but the execution is pretty subpar.

It honestly looks like a quick five-minute Photoshop job from a first year design class and someone forgot to hide all the other layers they had on before exporting. Let’s not even mention the lack of a black mask on Black Mask.

And yet, the Birds of Prey poster still actually works. It’s almost like the folks at DC deliberately made it so bad that it ended up somewhere in the realm of good.

Sure it looks like a quick copy and paste job but we definitely get a sense of what they’re doing tone-wise with Birds of Prey and the bright colours are a welcome relief to the grim-dark aesthetic of David Ayer’s god awful Suicide Squad.

Plus we shouldn’t be surprised that Margot Robbie as Harley Quinn in a basic festival chick outfit is the focus of the poster since she’s easily the most popular character.

Other than a brighter colour palette and Black Mask without his black mask, there’s not much more to glean from the poster.

But hey, a poster doesn’t make a movie and here’s hoping “The Harley Quinn Movie (oh and the Birds of Prey might turn up)” will skip over the bad part and go straight for the good when it comes out on February 7, 2020.

The Confirmed Cast For The Suicide Squad Throws Up A Lot Of Questions

Eat your heart out, Avengers: Endgame.

After months of dropping little tidbits on how work is going on DC’s upcoming film, The Suicide Squad, James Gunn has finally revealed the most substantial bit of information yet.

Taking to Twitter, the director has confirmed the full cast for his take on Suicide Squad by dropping a bingo card of names who will be in the film, some who have been confirmed and many who haven’t.

The cast list is about as star-studded as you’re going to get but it does throw up a few questions about this James Gunn-ified version of Suicide Squad.

Of the 24 names, four – Viola Davis, Jai Courtney, Margot Robbie and Joel Kinnaman – from the first Suicide Squad are returning. So is this new film a sequel, reimagining, reboot or some other interpretation? Hell, is this even part of the established DC Extended Universe or will it be shuffled alongside the upcoming Batman solo flick and Joker as standalone films?

What happened to all the surviving characters from Suicide Squad who aren’t returning? Did they just cut ties from the rest of the squad before moving cities or something?

Where’s Jared Leto? Okay, his take on the Joker may have been horrendous (or great depending on who you ask) but you’d think there’s some unfinished business with the character. At the very least you’d think Gunn might just kill him off and rid him from our collective memories forever.

Who is everyone going to play and will everyone get enough screentime? When you’ve got folk like Taika Waititi, Peter Capaldi, Idris Elba, Michael Rooker and Nathan Fillion, it’s going to be mighty difficult to service everyone while also making sure they’re not there just to serve as background fodder.

Where did John Cena come from? Okay he’s got the physicality to play a superhero/villain but this was a bit of a surprise.

With so many names, how many are going to get killed off over the course of two or so hours of Suicide Squad shenanigans? Gunn said “Don’t get too attached” to the characters before following it up with a slightly chilling “oh you beautiful optimist” to someone who guessed a 50% mortality rate to the cast.

Right now we have a lot of questions but not a lot of answers, and it’s highly unlikely we’ll get any more info for a while since production on The Suicide Squad is still in its early days so we’re in for a long wait.

But hey, if there’s anyone who can pull off a reimagining/re-whatever of DC’s Suicide Squad involving nearly an entirely new cast, it’s James Gunn.

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