Bleats

Leonardo DiCaprio Is Why The Amazon Rainforest Is Burning According To Brazil's Wacko Pres

Yep, that definitely sounds correct.

Stop the presses everyone because we have a massive reveal that’ll rock the boat: Hollywood superstar and committed environmentalist Leonardo DiCaprio is actually the man behind the burning of the Amazon rainforest.

Shocker right?

He had us fooled this whole time.

This comes from *checks notes* Brazil’s wacko far-right president, Jair Bolsonaro, who’s been going around telling reporters and folks on Facebook (as per The Guardian) that Leo is bankrolling the deliberate burning of the Amazon because of, uh, reasons.

No one really knows what was going on in Jair’s head when he decided to go around screaming “This Leonardo DiCaprio’s a cool guy, isn’t he? Giving money for the Amazon to be torched,” but presumably it has something to do with Jair preferring to blame Leo for bankrolling the fires instead of acknowledging the crap job he’s done on handling the deforestation of the Amazon.

Jair also really, really hates environmental campaigners, NGOs and basically anyone who have spoken out in defence of the Amazon and has criticised him for his questionable stances on the environment so there’s also that.

Jair Bolsonaro in a nutshell.

Then again, we shouldn’t be surprised that Jair is sprouting this sort of nonsense. After all, this is the same chap who has been called the “Trump of the tropics” and thinks “it’s enough to poop every other day” is the appropriate response to fixing the climate crisis.

To be fair though, Leonardo DiCaprio is indeed bankrolling some kind of activity in Brazil. And by that we mean he pledged $5 million in funding to help fight the fires in the Amazon rainforest.

Between Trump failing his way into impeachment in the U.S., Boris Johnson making a clot of things in the UK, Scott Morrison doing whatever he’s doing in Australia and Jair making up ridiculous lies about Hollywood stars who are doing environmental things he doesn’t like, it’s almost like every world leader is doing limbo in a desperate attempt to lower the bar.

If we are to blame Leonardo DiCaprio for anything, it’s for avoiding the question of whether Jack could’ve fit on the door at the end of Titanic.

The Justice League Snyder Cut: What The Hell Is It And Why It'll Never See The Light Of Day

A deep(ish) dive into one of comic book film's biggest "what ifs".

It goes without saying that 2017’s Justice League was a monumental critical and commercial flop for the ages. But perhaps even more headline-grabbing than the movie‘s failure is the behind-the-scenes chaos that plagued Justice League, all of which birthed this “Snyder Cut” thing that’s been circling the internet for years now.

Since the “Snyder Cut” is here to stay indefinitely due to fans who simply won’t let it die, we’ve decided to make lemons out of lemonade by providing an ELI5 explainer on what the hell it is and why fans are kicking up such a fuss over what is, on paper, just a slightly different edit of Justice League.

What the hell is the ‘Snyder Cut’ anyway?

The ‘Snyder Cut’ is what Justice League was originally supposed to be as envisioned by Zack Snyder before he stepped down from the director’s chair and Joss Whedon was brought in to fix the film.

The longer explanation involves the plans Snyder originally had for the film. He was the helm of Justice League for most of the film’s production but stepped down months before the release in order to deal with a family tragedy.

With Snyder out and the studio nervous about the film’s prospects due to the negative reception to the previous couple of DC films, Batman v Superman and Suicide Squad, the suits brought in Joss Whedon to give Justice League a major overhaul and to strip away the grimdark aesthetic Snyder loves so much.

The final result that was released in cinemas was a 120-minute long horrific Frankenstein’s monster featuring bits of what Snyder had originally shot, newly filmed scenes from Joss Whedon.

But the biggest change was the cutting of several story and character threads established by Snyder’s original script (which will be discussed in the following point). It was reported that the “Snyder Cut” was a whopping 214 minutes long behemoth and was supposed to lead to even bigger things.

Things that Justice League aren’t.

Okay, so what’s the fuss over this ‘Snyder Cut’?

Hoo boy, best take a seat because this is going to be a long one.

So Zack Snyder originally pitched to Warner Bros. a five-film arc that formed the basis of the “DC Extended Universe,” which is DC’s answer to Marvel’s cinematic universe. His idea involved a Superman film (Man of Steel), a Batman and Superman film (Batman v Superman), and a trilogy of Justice League films.

The trilogy of Justice League films never happened as explained in the previous point. Joss Whedon’s work effectively laid to rest Snyder’s Justice League trilogy plan.

Now here’s where the 214-minute “Snyder Cut” comes into play.

In the months after Justice League‘s release, info about Snyder’s original vision for film started coming out and when Snyder confirmed that a cut of his version of Justice League exists, this made hardcore fans super excited and upset over what might’ve been.

The furor reached a new peak when further details of Snyder’s trilogy came to light through various sources, such as Kevin Smith. Apparently the “Snyder Cut” was originally supposed to end with a massive tease of Darkseid, the ultimate big bad in the DC films (think the DC version of Thanos). This was then supposed to lead into the following narrative arc spread out across a hypothetical Justice League 2 and Justice League 3:

  • After teasing Darkseid in the “Snyder Cut,” he would’ve been the big bad in Justice League 2.
  • JL2 would see the heroes go to space and take the fight to Darkseid.
  • Green Lantern was to be introduced in JL2.
  • Lois Lane would be killed, sending Superman into a frenzy and making him vulnerable to being controlled by Darkseid.
  • The heroes lose big time in JL2 and Darkseid, with Superman under his control, invades Earth (which was actually glimpsed at in Batman v Superman).
  • JL3 was to be set in the post-apocalyptic earth that was actually glimpsed at in Batman v Superman and revolves around the heroes’ last stand against Darkseid.
  • Batman sacrifices himself at some point.

Needless to say that Snyder had some epic (and dark) plans for his Justice League trilogy and it’s the thought of missing out on this narrative arc that’s caused fans to kick up a stink about getting the “Snyder Cut” released in hopes that Warner Bros. will change its mind and let Snyder complete his trilogy as intended.

(Fast forward to the 31 minute mark for the good stuff about JL2 and JL3.)

Right, will we ever see it then?

In a word, nope.

Despite all the fan furor over the “Snyder Cut” and ringing endorsements from Justice League stars like Ben Affleck, Jason Momoa and Gal Gadot, there are two reasons why we’ll never see the original 214-minute version of Justice League.

Firstly, there’s no official confirmation that the “Snyder Cut” even exists in a watchable form. Depending on who you ask, it’s either all done (as per Zack Snyder), there’s a rough cut that needs some final visual effects and editing work (as per Kevin Smith) or it’s an unfinished mess (as per Danny Elfman, who did the score for Joss Whedon’s version of Justice League).

Secondly, the “Snyder Cut” movement may have gotten a heap of buzz online, but the demand for it’s release comes primarily from a loud and hardcore but ultimately small group of fans rather than the general public.

Combine the overall low demand with the negative reception to Batman v Superman and the potential tens of millions needed to finish Snyder’s Justice League, it simply makes no sense for Warner Bros. to risk losing even more money by releasing the “Snyder Cut.” For all those holding out hope, best cut your losses now as the studio itself has made it clear that there’s no plans to release the film ever.

So there you have it, hopefully this shines a light on what the hell the “Snyder Cut” is and what the goddamn fuss is about. Let’s finally put this fantasy to rest because not only is it pointless but no one (outside of hardcore nerds) really gives a crap about Justice League anymore.

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