From taking down Al Capone to capturing the Unabomber, the FBI have conducted a heap of important investigations over the last several decades, many of which are still kept under lock and key from the public.
But the Bureau has now declassified the files on what may be the biggest case they’ve every launched: the investigation into the existence of Bigfoot.
That’s right folks, the FBI legitimately looked into whether the mythical Sasquatch was actually an actual thing between 1976 and 1977 and it seems like they took it way more seriously than any of us would’ve thought.
Bigfoot: https://t.co/Dk93p4zbJO
— FBI Records Vault (@FBIRecordsVault) June 5, 2019
The investigation file spans 22 pages of correspondence and newspaper clippings, and reveals that the Bureau launched their probe into Bigfoot at the behest of Peter Byrne, the director of the now-shuttered Bigfoot Information Center and Exhibition, which was a legit thing that was supported by the Academy of Applied Sciences in Boston.
Over the course of nearly two years and several firm but politely worded letters, Byrne pestered the FBI over whether they have any secret Bigfoot knowledge they might be hoarding before asking if they wouldn’t mind taking a break from their less serious investigations and testing a bunch of alleged Sasquatch hairs he found.
The Bureau told Byrne that they had no idea what he was going on about but were more than happy to use their labs to analyse his supposed Bigfoot hair sample “in the interest of research and scientific inquiry.”
Disappointingly, the results concluded that the hairs were in fact not from a rare humanoid creature but actually from some deer and the FBI closed its Bigfoot probe shortly after in 1977. The folks at the Bureau were very polite about the whole thing though and sent Byrne a nice letter along with his “Bigfoot” hair samples.
That is not a man… oh wait it is.
Now there are a few things we can conclude from the FBI’s probe into Sasquatch. Firstly, the creature is almost is either a made up fantasy and or the red-haired third cousin of the deer family. The other alternative is that Bigfoot actually exists and the Bureau are hiding the details from everyone, which is what a bunch of people still believe even today.
Secondly, it seems like the FBI are kind enough to launch random probes “in the interest of research of scientific inquiry” or if it piques their interest enough if you ask nicely.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a sample to send to the folks in Washington D.C. that’ll definitely help with their investigation into the Loch Ness Monster.