Possible SPOILERS AHEAD if you haven’t seen Avengers: Infinity War and Ant-Man And The Wasp.
Up until the point when Thor cleaved his new magic axe into Thanos’ chest with a 10/10 throw at the end of Avengers: Infinity War (only to gloat and subsequently doom half the universe to an ashy end), everyone was wondering how on earth were the Avengers going to take down the seemingly indestructible purple Mad Titan.
Disregarding Thor, if Tony Stark got handily desuited and Hulk got beaten so badly he’s gone into permanent hiding in Bruce Banner’s body, then some outside-of-the-box thinking would be needed for the Avengers to triumph.
One particularly creative Redditor came up with an idea that’s so crazy that it will make you wonder why you didn’t think of it: putting Ant-Man up Thanos’ butt and having him expand.
On (toilet) paper, it seems like a bold but potentially good strategy. Get Scott right up there in Thanos’ good bits and turn him into a gross pile of purple mush from the inside out by expanding into Giant-Man. But sadly, that plan would fail before Ant-Man gets past the Mad Titan’s waistband.
According to the Redditor who brought up the idea in the first place, it is highly unlikely that Scott will be able to even wound Thanos after expanding let alone kill him.
Ant-Man And The Wasp showed that when Scott was forced to curl himself up uncomfortably when enlarged in a small room rather than breaking apart the walls. Combine that with Thanos’ near-invulnerability against the high-tech Iron Man suit (which is much more durable than the Ant-Man suit and some measly plaster walls), Scott basically becomes instant mush the moment he expands in the purple giant’s butt.
That image of Scott being crushed in Thanos’ butt is in your brain now.
That failing strategy might’ve bought the Avengers some precious seconds against Thanos since it would at leave him in some discomfort, but Scott’s hypothetical death via rectal disintegration ultimately wouldn’t have done much in the long run.
And with the all-powerful Captain Marvel waiting in the wings to have a crack at the Mad Titan, who is gravely injured thanks to Thor anyway, Ant-Man will probably be glad that his services won’t involve any rear entries into giant purple aliens.
It was a valiant effort nonetheless but for now, we’ll just have to go back to the drawing board until all is revealed in Avengers: Endgame in April.